Shattered
by Morgri
Summary: After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the hopelessness, shattered Naruto. Now he only thinks of others happiness, and what better way to make them happy, but to rid them of himself?
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of himself? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

By the way this takes place after the chuunin exams, and that's it. Other then that, this story does NOT follow the story-line of Naruto.

"Speaking"

_ thoughts_

** other peoples writing**

Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

**__**

**__**

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

_I stood there hopeless…it was there first time this had happened. I actually felt like…I was giving up. I looked down; both my friends lay there unconscious. What happened? It was me? Is this why they hated me? T-that wasn't fair, he took me by surprise! That darn thing inside of me, he took control of everything! My mind, my body, my spirit… my soul, he took it and used it against me! I lost to myself, and something bad happened. I-I didn't k-kill them did I? I felt tears run down my cold cheeks; they were… my friends weren't they?_

_I could have told them, then they could have stopped me… they could have killed me. It would have been better that way, right? If I were dead… guh, why are these tears coming? I've been alone this whole time right, why did this m-monster have to enter me!? Stop sobbing! Stop sobbing! They hated me anyway… but there not dead! One of them is moving…what should I do? What should I do!?)_

_What's right, right? Who cares about me, I guess this was the reason they hate me, I-I did this. I almost killed them. Seeing there bodies, there bloodied bodies, are they alive? I'll carry them to the hospital… they'll be alright, right!?_

_There I did it; I took them to the hospital. I wasn't welcomed there, I know it, I saw it in them. There cold stares, the ones I've always gotten… I-I'm so tired of those. I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Can't you stop, do you want be gone that bad? I'm just a person; I'm a person… or… a monster? That's what I am aren't I? A monster! That's why they hate me, that's why they'll always hate me… because I'm me… and not… me…_

_Is that a bad thing? Me? I always that I was kind…I tried to be. I never hurt the other kids, not when I was young at least. They… hurt me. They called me names, they beat me up… and what did the adults do? I never saw them do anything… I was just alone… alone like I am now. Is that a bad thing? To be alone, if I'm alone they don't stare at me like they do, if I'm alone I'm not insulted, I'm not screamed, I'm not hurt, if I'm alone, I'm ok… but… I don't want to be alone._

_I h-hate being alone! Err, why me! Why me! I'm tired of it; I don't want to be alone. Why do I hide it then? To get attention, it never worked! Never once at all, but… t-that isn't a bad thing, right? I-I'm the bad thing aren't I?_

_I-I never thought about that. Maybe it's just me; I deserve to be, don't I? I mean, they always told me that didn't they? Kakashi-sensai never objected…neither did Sasuke, nor for that matter Sakura. Not even Iruka-sensai, I guess it was…me. Not the fox – no not the fox, rather Naruto… me. Me, just me._

_But I know what will make them real happy! Maybe if I do this I won't see cold stares anymore, maybe I'll see smile… even if it's just in my dreams. Yeah! Wow! Let me go get something to do it with! A kunai! That's perfect, I will do it with a kunai… but it won't… hurt right? I mean I've heard that it's a great remedy! Yes, there right! It probably is, I'm always wrong, aren't I?_

_But that's good, because, I won't be here anymore to not be right anyway. Now, where can I cut at…I heard it's good at the wrists so let me cut there first. OUCH! That hurt… but it feels… so… good! So relieving… so nice. You know, maybe me being gone won't be that bad after all. This feels so great, how bout when I'm gone? It will be perfect, me not here to bother the world, it will just be me… alone, forever._

_Goodbye Sasuke, Sakura, Kakashi-sensai. Goodbye, I hope you'll be as happy as I am… n-now… wow I'm becoming so sleepy, maybe I'll sleep while, tonight, maybe I'll see well every night knowing that I'm no longer…hated._

_G-Goo-Goodbye…_

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Morgri- I would of loved to end the story there… but I want to still continue :p

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A girl paced back and forth accordingly. Just hours before she and her teammate had awoken. From what they didn't know, but it seemed like minor injuries nonetheless, for they woke up feeling refreshed and better then normal. It was odd. It was like something helped them…for Sakura felt much stronger and faster then usual; apparently Sasuke felt the same way.

There was only one thing wrong... one person was missing. But this person wasn't a person who had run away, rather, a person who did something much more drastic. "Why… did he do this? All of a sudden he just decides to do something like that! That stu-pid" The pink haired girl paused at the end. "I-I…" A tear ran down her eye.

Naruto wasn't like this! He was always happy, he was a person who loved his life wasn't he? "Why did he do this?" Sakura muttered angrily as she began to sob. "I'm glad he survived, but… he's different. It's… just not right, the way he is acting. He won't even say anything to me! WHY? Why did he do this?"

"Because he was scared," came the reply from a calm dark headed boy. His name Sasuke, who while not showing it pondered on why Naruto would do such a thing.

"Scared?" Sakura spoke sarcastically, "Since when has Naruto been scared of anything?" She queried silently guiding her speech toward Sasuke.

"I don't know…" The simply reply was said.

"Did you see him!?" She began to sob once again, "He looked so different. He looked hopeless; he looked so defenseless, so lonely, so…scared." Haruna Sakura stopped. She suddenly became pale. He did… look scared. 

A dark haired girl by the name of Hyuuga Hinata caught Sakura's attention, "Naruto-Kun!" She heard a fearful tone in her voice. 

Sakura stopped the girl, which in turn surprised Hinata, "You… don't want to see him," Sakura murmured sadly. She clearly knew the feelings Hinata had towards the boy. Hinata flinched; tears began to run down her eyes. Sakura knew what Hinata was feeling; she knew that Hinata was worried sick about the boy, but… what would happen to her if she saw him? They didn't need another depressed ninja.

"Ok…" Hinata tried to hold back her tears.

"It's ok to cry," Sakura hugged the girl; Sakura knew what she was feeling. Horrid images flashed in her mind. What happened just a day ago felt like it just happened again and again in her mind. Sakura didn't like it, each time she remembered it more and more guilt began to plague her, what happened if Naruto never woke up, what happened if he was dead? The doctor had given no word yet, but he surely would soon.

Flashback

"Naruto!" Sakura called opening the door to his home. She and Sasuke were sent to his house because he didn't show up for training, which was highly unusual because he was usually the first one there. "Naruto!" Sasuke called hearing no reply, "That idiot," he snorted, "Sakura go see if he's in his room, how about it."

"Ok, Sasuke-kun," Sakura spoke spirited, she seemed quite refreshed ever since see woke up at the hospital. She couldn't remember why she was in the hospital though, that was odd. She slowly made her way threw his house, it was a lot messier then she'd actually imagined, but she couldn't blame him, he did live alone all his life, which was odd as well because he never did know his parents, in fact, none of Konoha did.

Sakura finally found Naruto's bedroom door. She opened it, "Naru…" She stopped seeing that he wasn't in there. She smirked for a second wondering what would be in his room, she slowly entered and walked toward a desk that stood right beside Naruto's unmade bed.

Apparently Naruto left never closed one of the draws. Sakura looked inside and found a bunch of papers; the most recently written on was of course the one on top. _I wonder what he's written her, _Sakura thought picking up the paper that was on top and began to read it.

**_I spy with my little eye…_**

**_A boy with blue eyes_**

**_Who even though he tries…_**

**_He fails…_**

**_I spy with my little eye…_**

**_Someone lost in memories_**

**_Who not strong rather weak…_**

**_And he fails_**

**_ I Spy with my little eye_**

**_A burden to a town_**

**_A demon in the making…_**

**_Who fails…_**

****

**_I spy with my little eye…_**

**_A boy who has no hope_**

**_A fool with no purpose_**

**_Who always cries…_**

****

**_And I spy with my little…_**

**_The boy with no fire_**

**_No passion or desire_**

**_Who just…will…die…_**

****

**_Die… die alone…*_**

_Strange, what's Naruto been writing? It almost sounds like he is referring to himself. A boy with blue eyes… hmm. _Sakura pondered on what else he could be writing, though, she didn't dare to read anything else. That stuff was way too personal to be looking at. But then, what did it really matter? It was Naruto, Sakura was sure he wouldn't care.

Sakura, though, decided not to tamper with anymore of the things written by Naruto. They were far to depressing in her thoughts. 

She decided that she was in his room enough for one day. She turned toward the door and there she saw him. 

He looked at her… looked at her as he was trying to hide something. Fear and confusion both were apparent on his face. Sakura gasped, she had been looking threw his stuff and she didn't even notice that he was sitting right there. "Naruto, you scar…," she stopped, looking at him confused. He looked so light-headed, as if he were about to go to sleep… or something else.

"I'm sorry I was looking at your stuff, I never noticed you behind your door… Hey!? Are you listening to me! I'm trying to apologize, why do you look so light-heade…," She then saw it. Blood, blood ran down both his hands, so much that they had covered his hands and now left almost a large pool of blood on both his clothes and his bedroom floor. Naruto just slipped right into his own blood on the floor, as if he was never awake… as if he had even saw or listened to her the whole time she was in there. He was just… unconscious…

_Die… die alone…?_ Sakura screamed.

Reality

Sakura was now crying with Hinata. She knew not whether she was hugging Hinata to comfort Hinata or to comfort herself. He was alone? Why didn't they notice that? They were Naruto's teammates they were supposed to know how he felt; they were supposed to know everything about the boy! Yet, they just let him almost commit suicide. It was pure luck that Kakashi sent Sasuke and her to his house.

This is why she hated hospitals, so much pain, so much depression. And now, there teammate was in this hospital. Naruto's poem ran through her head again and again. How did they not notice his pain? It just wasn't fair. The boy's past was evident in there lives, but he never acted as if he were sad… he always acted as if he were… happy.

"I-I," Hinata tried to stop sobbing. The boy meant way too much to the girl. He had… been there for her; he made her feel as if she changed. All threw the chuunin exams Naruto was there for her. He made Hinata feel like she was special. And now, she couldn't be there for Naruto. What kind of person was she? 

Why couldn't she stop crying? "I want to see him," She sobbed, "I want to be there for him, like he was there… for me!" The girl was certainly aware of her feelings for the blonde haired boy, yet she never could manage to tell him. Now, he was in this hospital! And now, Hinata might never again have the chance to tell Naruto of her feelings.

She tried to loosen her grip of Sakura, but she wouldn't let go, "You can't, they won't let us…"

"What," Hinata sniffed, "Didn't you already see him?"

"No… we have to wait until he wakes up…"

"Oh…"

"That Naruto won't be asleep much longer," interrupted Sasuke.

"No, he won't he is awake now" A doctor interrupted.

"WHAT!" Screamed Sakura, "Let's go see him!"

-End Chapter 1-

Well, there's chapter one… I wonder what will happen when Naruto goes into see him? Next chapter up soon! R&R


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

By the way this takes place after the chuunin exams (also after Naruto and Sasuke fight it out [meaning Naruto knows the Resengan]) and that's it. Other then that, this story does NOT follow the story-line of Naruto.

Morgri – I'm not sure if I will put romance into the story right now, simply because Naruto is overcome with depression. Though, I might add some Naruhina at the end. Now notice I *might* or it may be Sakura, or it could be Sasuke. However, I'm not heavy Yaoi fan, so if it's Sasuke it will probably heavy friendship not love. =]

[Song at the beginning {By myself: Linkin Park}]

"Speaking"

_(thoughts)_

***other peoples writing***

****Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

__

**_Chapter two_**

**__**

**__**

** If I turn my back I'm defenseless**

** And to go blindly seems senseless**

** If I hide my pride and let it all go on then they'll**

** Take from me till everything's gone**

** If I let them go I'll be outdone**

** But if I try to catch them I'll be outrun**

** How do you think I've lost so much**

** I'm so afraid I'm out of touch**

** How do you expect I will know what to do**

** When all I know is what you tell me to**

***By Myself***

_Ugh, am I awake? Well where am I? Is this heaven or hell? I guess it doesn't matter because at least I won't cause any more trouble. It will be me, just me, no more pain, no more insults, no more glares. I thought trusting someone would help, but all along my destiny was to live in loneliness._

_Oh, my head hurts, I thought pain ended in heaven? My eyes feel heavy, why? I wish I could see, but I guess that's what I deserve, everybody says so. I hate that, why did I have to be this way? Why do I have to cry alone? Why did pain come to me? I tried, I tried to live up to there expectations.... why didn't it work? O great I'm sniffling, I don't want to cry! I hate crying, because… No body is here to cry with me. All the other people who were always crying always had someone there for them; they had somebody who loved them, not me._

_Huh? My vision is coming back to me? That's good, maybe something will go right for me. But I don't deserve it, everybody says that I don't, they all say " he shouldn't have anything," they say, "He, that devil, the one who deserves nothing, I wish he had nothing, not life or anything" I guess I believe this. I should, there always right aren't they? So living in this hell, it should be… comforting… at least *they* will be happy. I guess… living alone won't be all that bad…_

_O yeah right!? I hate myself, my life, my appearance, my personality, my soul, everything! I hate it! I can't take it much more! I'm always defenseless, every time! I'm outdone; even when I try to catch them I'm outrun! Is this my destiny? Ok, so I don't hate myself, I just don't like what I have done. Everyone says I do everything wrong; but doesn't trying count for anything? It should! I wish it did! I always read in books that trying was good! I guess it was all a lie!_

_Well I can see everything now, am I in heaven or hell, which one? I'm… in a bed? What are all these needles? What with that annoying beeping sound? It sounds like one of those things in a hospital. It's on my left, well then what's on my right? Let me get up and see. OUCH! Never mind, I think I'll just lay here and live in my loneliness instead. Cause there's probably people here, and I don't want them to hurt me either._

_Huh? Who just came in? A girl with pink hair? She looks familiar. I know I've seen her some where! Maybe, she will be nice to me… maybe she will cry with me! Maybe I won't be alone anymore. Let me try to say something to here! I hope she's not mad or anything though, the only time people talk to me is when there mad…I hate that, because something about me always makes *them* hate me. I wish I could figure it out…_

"Naruto you *idiot*, you had us-!"

_Why did she call me that? Even when I'm dead… unless… oh no. What should I do, she called me an idiot! That means I did something wrong, but I've been here the whole time. Oh… I'm crying now, right in front of her. I tried to say something! But I just couldn't. All I can do now is just cry. _

_But, why couldn't I respond? I opened my mouth to say I'm sorry for what ever I did. No words came out though, why? It's like I just blurted out silence! I'm confused now. My head hurts, and I've done something wrong._

_She's gonna try to hurt me! I know it, they always do! I got to hide, somewhere anywhere, Err, why can't I stop crying? Because I know it, she wants to do something bad to me. Under the covers, maybe she won't do anything if I hide there._

"Naruto…?"

_Oh no, she can hear me, I've got to stop crying… or she will hurt me. She will hurt me! She will hurt me! Oh no, now I'm shaking, just what I need, crying and shaking! Grr! Why? Why? Stop it, Stop it! Ahhhh, why can't I say anything! Please don't hurt me, I will try harder next *time* I promise I promise. Then won't you be happy? Just please don't hurt me. She can't hear me, she can't hear me! Oh no, what will I do? I'm crying even harder now, and it hurts, really badly. My head feels like is about to explode, my wrists hurt horribly._

_Why though? It felt so good a little while a go, maybe… it works better the second time around, yeah, maybe next time. Ah, but I can't concentrate on that now, because I'm crying, and when I cry they'll hurt me. They always do! They do! They Do! They'll say "Stop crying you idiot," or "You don't deserve to cry, you deserve to be dead!" They always did. I cause trouble even when I'm crying… if only they knew me. I'm not so bad aren't I? Oh… but what am I saying? If they say I'm bad, then I'm bad._

_Oh no… I'm crying harder now! Everybody is probably sick of my crying. At least when I was at my home… alone… I could cry alone. I heard once that crying was good, they all lied! They said that is was good emotionally, that if you cry it helped you feel better afterwards, and they said that you would eventually stop crying. It's all a lie! It is! I always cry, but I can't stop, and I don't feel better, I feel worse! They said that eventually somebody would come and cry with you, nobody ever did that with me. I was always alone… Wait, I'm still alone._

_But that's good right? If I'm alone they'll leave me alone, if I'm alone they won't hate me! But then, why did *she* come in a call me and Idiot? I was alone wasn't I? I was asleep or unconscious or something like that, but I still caused trouble! Crying doesn't help, but then, why am I crying? Why do I feel like when something, anything, happens I have to cry? M-maybe they are right, but it still doesn't feel good. Then why am I CRYING!!??_

_I wish I didn't cry, I always cry… Where's something to write with? That always calms me down! Maybe if I go out there I can get something to write with… but, *they're* out there, and if I go out there they'll just hurt me more, won't they? I can feel my self shaking, maybe if I curl up I will stop, and if I stop shaking, maybe I will stop crying. Let me try…_

_O great, she's saying something, I can't tell what is, but I don't care, I'm crying more now, it will be any second now. She's going to come in here and hurt me! What did I do this time? I hate this, I hate this, I hate this!_

_*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*_

Hinata ran into the room, something was wrong! She turned to see Sakura just standing there dumbfounded, mouth open and all. She turned toward the bed, someone was inside that bed… crying, sobbing. "N-Na-Naruto-kun?" She felt her eyes tear, what was happening!? She treaded slowly towards the bed, and unveiled the covers.

She tried to hug him, but at her slightest touch he flinched. There, he looked at her. He looked at her differently the he ever had before. She walked backwards towards the door, her mouth covered, as she felt her tears give way.

The way she looked at him. It was a look she never ever saw or wanted see from Naruto, it was a look of fear. Fear mixed with confusion, mixed with loneliness, mixed sadness, something she never wanted to see from him again! She saw that Naruto lost something in his eyes, some spark that he used to have, some glimmer, some kind of beautiful shimmer, it was gone. 

Hinata gave way. She sobbed looking for the nearest person for comfort. She hugged someone. The way he flinched, she couldn't… bear to see that, it was horrible. So much pain, how could she have let the person she loved the most look like this? She was supposed to help him, to comfort him, and there, he refused… a hug from her. 

Sasuke scoffed, "Is it that bad?" He said pulling Hinata away from his body. Little did Hinata know that it was he that she was hugging.

"Sa-Sasuke, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" She managed over tears.

"It's… ok," Sasuke tried to sound sincere. Sasuke felt the girl's pain; he was gentlemanly enough to know that he should in fact comfort the girl. He seemed out of place as well, not knowing whether to believe that he did in fact try to commit suicide, or whether *to* believe it. Was this really Naruto? "How… is… he?" The self-proclaimed genius uttered under his breath. Not even he, the genius, could figure out why someone would do this.

"H-he's," Hinata tried to speak, "Horrible…" she began to sob once again, "The way he looked at me, if you saw I-it," Hinata couldn't finish.

"You shouldn't- ugh," Sasuke searched for words, but what could he say? He hadn't seen Naruto, and right now, he didn't know if he wanted too… yet. Was he just scared to see Naruto… weak? And either way, wasn't he his rival, why wasn't he happy, that's how he should have been. But, then again… they had shared many great times together; many great fights, and even withstood some quarrels! Together they grew strong, together they overcame what they shouldn't have overcome, and they single handedly took on some of the greatest ninja in the town. Why, Naruto defeated Neji, and he had defeated Gaara, and even though he wasn't there to see it he sure was proud of Naruto.

Sasuke sighed; he remembered the incident all to well.

Flashback

"Naruto!" Sasuke called hearing no reply, "That idiot," he snorted, "Sakura go see if he's in his room, how about it." Sasuke was very annoyed at this. He saw her leave while speaking to himself, "How could… Naruto… Be late… For training, WHEN I FEEL THIS GOOD!" He stomped angrily toward the kitchen to where Naruto would probably be. He did this all while expelling his anger, "I mean, you think I could finally enjoy training, sheesh. Man! I felt confident that I would be able to 'own'," (he said "own" in a very sophisticated manner), "Him!"

Walking into the kitchen, he found small drops of blood leading toward the second exit of the kitchen. He figured it was from some kind of wounds that he probably received a little while ago at training… but it was still weird because this blood wasn't dry yet. Sasuke didn't care, "Naruto, you idiot" Sasuke thundered, "I'll make sure I hand your butt the worst whipping of your life if you don't show yourself! Yeah! You bet I will, I'm feeling good today and I will show you that you ARE dead last!" Sasuke proclaimed this with such enthusiasm that he didn't even recognize himself, he even noticed his fist was being held up towards the sky while at the same time being balled up! He never felt so good!

Well, what the heck anyway? He was feeling good, a lot more powerful. In fact Kakashi recognized this right when he showed up for training. He wanted to make the most of it! I mean what if this was just a one day experience! That would totally suck! And I mean suck to the fullest rate of suck! The kind where you have to say suck with the capital s! So! Sasuke was feeling this good and Naruto was going to make this day "SUCK"!

Sasuke drooped his head, he couldn't believe the way he was acting, but who cared? It was just one day and he was only a *little* out of character, it wouldn't hurt him. He slowly followed the trail of blood seeing to were it led to. The trail (which appeared and disappeared because of the messy condition the house was in) eventually led toward his bedroom.

Naruto's house itself was pretty big, Sasuke had to admit. If only Naruto would have cleaned it up a little then it would be the perfect. I mean sure, it was small compared to the house he was living in, but it was really big for one person. It had a rather large bathroom, and ok sized kitchen, and two bedrooms. Not the biggest, but ok.

Sasuke slowly made is way through the clothes, the soda cans, and the scrolls. Suddenly he stopped. He heard a scream. Sakura? He ran toward the bedroom to make sure she was ok. She looked pale, and was looking straight towards the place that the door hid while it was open. On the side there was Naruto, he was lying is his own blood. 

Sasuke laughed "Good one Naruto, you almost got me there." This was all a trick, wow, the blood looked so authentic… "Naruto…?" He whispered, "Naruto, this isn't funny anymore!" He aimed his displeasure toward Naruto, who… didn't respond. It then hit him.

"Sakura!" he said almost panicking himself. He never saw this happen. Naruto wasn't this type of person why would he even – why was he even thinking of such a thing?! He slowly picked Naruto up. "Let's get him to the hospital!"

Reality

Sasuke flinched. He felt bad, there Naruto was dying, and all he did was LAUGH!? He felt tremendous guilt. He didn't understand Naruto, heck, he barely understood himself! And he was even thankful to Naruto for that reason! Though, he wouldn't lie to himself… he *thought* he knew Naruto. He thought he knew the loneliness he had been through, though he knew what it was like having no family, but in the end he didn't. That was the harsh reality… he didn't know what Naruto was going through, hence, he could not help Naruto.

But that didn't seem right. Sasuke had to do something; Naruto would have gladly helped him through his troubles, in fact… In some ways Naruto already had. He helped him get away from the hatred of his brother… He helped concentrate on other things. Though, of course, he still held a strong grudge against his murderer of a brother, but Naruto calmed down that anger immensely, which helped him out in his training. He could concentrate more, listened twice as well. He was becoming the genius he was hailed to actually be. That was all thanks to Naruto.

"Y-you should," Sasuke stuttered over his words, "Calm down a little. Crying over Naruto won't hel-…"

"B-but," Hinata sniffled, "I really want to help him, he… means a lot to me…" She confessed.

Sasuke sighed sadly, "If you really want to help him, then you should stop crying a find something that you could help him with. You were kind to him were you not?"

"Yes."

"Good, find something that will make him remember that kindness and just maybe you can help him out."

"You… really think so?"

"Of course"

Hinata lit up, maybe Sasuke was right. She skipped out of the hospital, thinking… maybe she just could help!

Sasuke however decided on something else. He would visit Naruto; perhaps his presence would put some life into the boy. By seeing Hinata it didn't seem like Naruto was doing very well. Who knows, but maybe, just maybe… he could help. But he didn't know how bad it actually was. He hadn't seen him yet…

Well whatever, if he kept confident surely Naruto would snap out of whatever he was in. In fact… perhaps it might actually work…

Sasuke trotted into the room, he gasped.

-End Chapter two-

Morgri – Thanks for all your reviews, I hope you liked this chapter just as much! Can Sasuke really help Naruto when he hasn't even seen him? You'll guys will have to find out… because that's all I'm going to tell you! I don't want to spoil it of course! He's seems confident! R&R!!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- I understand that the story is going kinda slow, but that is because it mainly consists of what Naruto is going through and how his friends react. I will probably speed it up in later chapters.

"Speaking"_(Thoughts)_

***other peoples writing***

****Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

**Chapter three**

_Huh? What happened? What time is it? That's weird, I just remember some kid coming in just a little bit ago. He looked like a serious person. He had black hair, and black eyes. I know I've seen him before, along with that other girl, the one with pink hair. Why can't I remember there names? My memory goes berserk when I think of them, though, when I do remember them I just get the same thing… the frowns, the insults, it's always the same. Whenever I think of them I get the idea that I let them down somehow, like I always made a situation worse, or I said something I shouldn't of, or worse, I couldn't get them out of danger._

_But I guess that doesn't really matter, because soon I'll be gone! I'll make sure of it somehow. I won't be a burden, I won't make people mad, and I won't get hurt. That's a good thing right? I'm just twelve and I'm already a burden, I couldn't imagine when I get older. They'll probably send something to kill me, right? So why not end it already? I could get up right now and just go, go straight to a cliff and walk off it. There's no way they could rescue me there. But then again, knowing me… It would probably turn out just the same way. I would some how hit water and save myself… but if it was water then I could do it too._

_Life is so Ironic isn't it? Seems to be for me; someone once said "Life is grand, live it to the fullest." And even though he wasn't talking to me, I thought I had understood that, but in reality it was just the other way. Life isn't great, life sucks! Especially for me, so why should I live with it? When everybody is having fun out there playing with there buddies and leaving me alone._

_Who saved me anyway? That was dumb, they wanted to get rid of me right? I guess they just wanted to hurt me some more… they always do. When I was younger they did the same, and what did they do the other kids!? They congratulate them for hitting me, spitting at me, cursing me, and insulting me? Yeah, they were allowed, but if I tried to even defend myself they all were on me! Some even beat me until I could barely move. Nobody would do anything, they would just watch! Some would even laugh!!!_

_Can't they see I'm a person? I didn't try to do a-any-thing. I-I just wanted them to play with me… to be my friends. But they didn't care! They laughed when I cried, they insulted me when I cried, they even made me cry more! But not anymore, I'm crying right now, this time they can't hurt me like that! I can cry alone, like I always did, like I always have done. But this time, when I cry they won't be able to come to my house to laugh at me. Why? Because I'll be gone! They can go laugh at my grave!!!_

_All that, all the insults, all the glares… they gave me nightmares. Soon enough I became scared, because I thought everybody was out to hurt me in some way. So I isolated myself for a while. Then that isolation turned into loneliness… because there was no one there. So I decided that if I put only a daily façade of happiness, carelessness and above all stupidity. Of course it worked to get attention… but the insults kept coming and coming. So what could I do? I would just go home a cry. And pretending to be happy in front of others… you know what that did… it showed my little strength. I had no strength to do anything, anything but cry. But what did crying do? It just showed my hopelessness, my hopelessness that nobody could see or didn't want to see. _

_And even if they did see, they didn't care. I'm sure most of them laughed. They laughed like they do now! I'm sure if they saw me cry right now they would just laugh, or insult me or something. It never stopped them before. So it's good there not here now or they would do that… because I am crying…_

_B-but I don't want that. I want somebody to cry with me… to comfort me. I wish somebody nice would come here now and make me stop crying. I-I guess I'm just… frustrated right now. Or maybe I'm just frightened, frightened that I'll always be alone. B-but that's MY destiny right? To be alone… forever. Since I was born that was my destiny, but why does it have to be mine? Why couldn't it have been somebody else's destiny? _

_Can't they here the hopelessness in my voice, can't they see stain on my face caused by my tears? It doesn't make sense… it never did. All I can do is sit here and cry while everyone else enjoys all there petty lives. They consider themselves "nice". That's funny; they never were nice to me, none of the world out there. Sure I had my moments with Iruka-Sensai but then I started to think of something. Did he really recognize me? He said so, but he never said anything when the insults came, he never cared when he saw all the glares..._

_But again, I guess that's just my fate…or maybe it wasn't my fate, maybe I made it my fate. Maybe my daily façade made it worse; maybe it just made the insults worse. So then, what should I do to stop them? If I stay here they keep comin, if I stay anywhere they come. So then… why should I do? I'm confused…_

_Everybody is probably laughing at me right now though. There laughing at how I was crying a little while ago when they were here. I guess… I'm just living to be a laughing stock. I still don't know though, Is it me, or is it the fox. Everything points out that it's me… so I guess I was right for once, it is me, and that will never change._

_*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*_

Dingaling, the obvious sound of somebody entering a door was heard, a flower shop to be precise. "So Naruto tried to commit suicide, huh?" The dull voice of Ino indicated boredom; which was easily apparent since she was resting her head on her hand and her arm on the pay-counter. "Doesn't seem too logical to me."

"How did you know he did that?" Sakura perked up out of her boredom (apparently she was resting both her arms and head on the table as well) visibly disturbed by the subject Ino had just brought up.

"Why it's the talk of the town, it has been for the last two days," Ino said this with so little enthusiasm that it was almost obvious she didn't even care about Naruto one bit. In fact after a little bit of talk with some people Sakura found that the adults were actually disappointed that Naruto DIDN'T die. This really got Sakura mad, how could people be so… so horrible with him? "What happened anyway? You did visit him didn't you?"

"Yes…"  
"So tell me about it! Did he act stupid as usual?"

"No… he almost seemed like… another person." Guilt still stayed with Sakura, It was as if she couldn't get it out of her mind. Even when she was bored it would get to her!

"Wow! What did he act like! I've heard people say he was a demon or something!" Enough chanted.

"Huh? Demon?" Sakura questioned suddenly, "What's a demon have to do with Naruto?" Well, this was something she never heard. Naruto and a demon didn't make any sense to her. But not only did that plagued her mind, something else did as well; she was out calling the people who wished Naruto had died without thinking of herself as well. She sighed; she was just as bad with him.

"Yes apparently they said that Naruto was a demon and stuff like that, so how did he act what, did he do!?"

"He seemed scared; I couldn't believe how he acted. He started to cry right in front of me, and then he hid under the covers as if I was going to do something to him! It didn't stop there, Hinata came in and tried to calm him down… Naruto flinched when she tried to hug him! Then Sasuke came in, he was calm at first, but when he saw Naruto he figured nothing was wrong with him, he went straight over to him and tried to pull him out of bed!"

"Did he get out?"

"No!" Her eyes almost teared, "Naruto started to breath very hard, as if he was having trouble breathing, we had to pull Naruto away, if we didn't Naruto would have died. Luckily he just fainted. Sasuke couldn't believe what he did afterward… neither could I. But what shocked me more was the way Naruto behaved. He would have never cried in front of me. I was so shocked I couldn't move…"

"Wow, doesn't seem too 'Demonish' to me…" She spoke returning to her boreded position.

"Uh… umm… I'm sorry but who is a 'demon'?" A girl inquired putting flowers on the desk to pay for them. Sure enough the girl was Hinata.

"Hinata! What are you doing here?" asked a surprised Ino. Hinata giggled, Ino hadn't seen her come in. "Wow, those are some pretty expensive flowers, who are they for?" she queried with a sheepish grin.

"Umm…" she stuttered with a slight blush, "There for Naruto-kun," she finally managed with a small gulp.

"Awe, how sweet!!" Sakura lit up clasping her hands together excitedly as she watched the young girl pay for the expensive flowers. Apparently Hinata did like Naruto as much as the thought. _Though_ Sakura thought _You think she would have known Naruto enough to stop blushing_.

"Wow, Naruto is getting so much attention these days," Ino sighed as she put the flowers into a vase and handed them to Hinata. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sakura paced slowly through the town. Everywhere she overheard people talking about Naruto. This bothered her immensely; not only did she feel guilt, but now she was overcome with anger. All people would talk about were things like "Why didn't that demon die?" She couldn't understand it, Naruto wasn't a demon, and he never seemed to be. He could be annoying sometimes; he could make stupid comments, but a demon? Never!

She tried to cover her ears and walk a little faster, but the words kept coming. Naruto was this; Naruto was that… what was wrong with these people? And how long of a walk was it to her house?! Maybe there she could have some time alone, maybe there she could think a little more. She was frustrated with herself, she was angry with the town, and she felt guilty about Naruto. What else would happen?

She arrived at her home and entered. She had not stayed at her home last night; she stayed at the hospital the whole night hoping that Naruto would wake up. He never did so she decided to go talk to Ino. She hoped talking with Ino would ease a little bit of the guilt and frustration… and it did! But going back outside, she had to face the world. All the bad stuff they said, why about Naruto.

"Did that monster die!?" Sakura's mother ran up to her almost smiling, however, when Sakura replied it dropped to a frown. "Darn, I hoped this would be the day!"

"The day for what!?" Sakura screamed in frustration and anger, "What is wrong with you people?" She stepped backwards glaring at her mother, "You're the same as them! Why do you want him to die?" Tears welded in her eyes, "What did he ever do to you?"

"He killed everybody!" Sakura's mother stopped her dead in her tracks.

"Huh?"

"He's that fox, the one who killed all those people long ago. He deserves to die, and I wish he did. That monster… I can't believe I even let you be on his team!"

Sakura took a step backward, all her fear, her frustration, her anger, gathered all upon her. She spoke calmly but rather scary, "No, mother, he's not the monster… you people are the monster!" Tears gave way, "Naruto is a person! He's just like you and me!? You should see him! Now I see why he acted the way he did! It's our fault! The way we treated him, these past two days all I've done is cried for how I treated Naruto! He deserved a lot better" She ran up her stairs and slammed the dear shut, leaving her mother shocked.

"You… would never understand… Naruto...!" She covered her head in her pillow. She didn't even now what she what was happening! In an instant everything went wrong. She was feeling great, she was feeling strong and what had to happen? Naruto had to try to kill himself and suddenly go into depression!? Why did he have to do that? Why couldn't things be normal?

And why… why didn't she and Sasuke now about Naruto being the fox that destroyed there town years ago? Again they had failed in knowing there teammate. Or maybe, Naruto didn't let them know for a reason. But he seemed so… happy. How could someone act so perfect? Never showing a sign that he was emotionally scared; Sakura knew he was never liked as a kid, she even rejected his friendship… many times. But that was because she wanted to be with the others… she wanted to be with the popular group. Never did she once think about his feelings.

Sakura realized how selfish she was. If she could only take it all back! She would be that bad to him, she would have done anything to have Naruto the same as he usually was… anything to make things normal again!

Sakura couldn't help but wonder how Sasuke was taking it all. It was almost 8:00 maybe today Sakura could get somewhat of a good rest…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The smell of nice hot bowls of Ramen filled the air. The Miso Ramen shop was in practically full. Even the owner of the shop was surprised saying he never had so many people before; it was as if the people were on a holiday or something. 

Sasuke however lay his head on counter in boredom… well boredom or misery. Maybe the two days that he missed of training was starting to affect him. Training gave him a sense that he was stronger; it made him belief that he would soon be able to achieve his ultimate goal. OF course, he still felt great, the effects of the unknown "hospital event" (as he now called it) still made him feel as if he had great power. But sure, you can feel great and miserable at the same time. Well, that's the way he felt.

He lazily waved to the owner to make him a bowl of Ramen. Naruto had told him countless times of how good this shop was, so Sasuke thought he would give it a try. Sasuke couldn't help but feel amused at how well the air smelt around. Yeah, but he had been there for the last three hours drinking tea all day long. He couldn't help but think of how he never acknowledged Naruto. He knew that was Naruto's true goal, but even if he tried to acknowledge him, he just couldn't. Why if he did Naruto would slack off on his training, therefore Sasuke himself would slack off, which meant that he would never achieve his goal.

All day the only thing the boy heard was excited voices of the sick grown-ups that were all around. He couldn't understand why the people were lamenting that Naruto didn't die. What was up with them? It's not like Naruto had *committed* some serious crime or anything.

"Ah, your that fox-boy's teammate aren't you?" A wader curiously handed Sasuke his Ramen. 

Though, Sasuke really didn't take it to well. "Yeah, what about it?" He said with a small glare. Frankly he was tired of people coming up to him and asking him that same question. 

"You think he will try… again?" The wader whispered to him.

"WHAT!? That's it I'm outta here," Sasuke snorted getting out of his seat. What… weird people… what idiots. If Naruto was dead last, then they were dead worst…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hinata entered into Naruto's room slowly and quietly. The slow paced breathing from Naruto told Hinata that he was better. From what she heard from the flower shop things got pretty bad in there. She couldn't help but smile a little; Naruto did look cute when he was sleeping.

He was sleeping… though; maybe he had wakened up earlier. She took small steps toward him keeping as quiet as she could… she didn't want to wake him up. It wasn't that she was afraid of him. 

She just…

Didn't…

Want to see that face…

Again...

That expression of loneliness, hopelessness, and weakness… she didn't want to see that face again! It scared her! For the past to days she was plagued by that face. Naruto was not that boy… Naruto was the confident and strong boy Hinata knew just weeks before… no *that* boy that was in her sights. Naruto… something about his name made her feel warm inside, it made her heart beat like it never did before! It gave her a feeling she never wanted to end! What happened?

Or…

Maybe… that Naruto she knew was all a lie. Maybe he is just a weak boy… a poor helpless boy…

But!

No! That wasn't Naruto… Naruto was Naruto! Nobody could change that! The boy in front of her was the boy she fell in love with. Even if he was a weak… helpless… scared… boy. She could understand, she *would* understand. 

What Naruto needed was kindness; he needed something that nobody had ever given him. _Maybe I could give him what he needs_ Hinata thought, as she slowly inched up to Naruto's ear. "Naruto," She said almost lovingly, "There *is* someone that loves you, and there is someone that will always love you." She slowly kissed him on the forehead put the vase of flowers on small table beside the bed.

She looked at him… one more time.

He was Uzumaki Naruto…

Just Uzumaki Naruto…

Naruto…

The boy she was in love with…

-End Chapter 3-

Grrrrrrr….. I'm sorry this chapter wasn't very good. I have to say it took a lot of thought on what to come up with next. Email me for anything you would like to see! By the way the next chapter will be up soon and it will better, I promise! As always R&R! 

By the way, due to school I might no be able to update very soon, but keep in mind that I will NOT fail to update. So keep a look out for my story.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- Gee!!! Not lots of angst in that last chapter…..ssssooooorrrrrrryyyyy. Anyway, there will be a lot more angst in this chapter and later ones. 

"Speaking"

_(Thoughts)_

***other peoples writing***

****Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

**Chapter Four**

_There are four words I never could comprehend… the first one is "kindness." I searched for the meaning of that word for a long time, but I never found it. I thought that kindness was when some person said "hey good job" but… I guess I will never know since nobody ever said that to me. I thought kindness was doing something that would make another person happy… but… nobody ever made me happy. I thought kindness meant cheering up someone who was down, but… nobody ever did that to me. Maybe… kindness is something that I'll never see or feel. Maybe for someone like me kindness was something that was never meant to be._

_But… what am I ranting about that word for? I don't even know what it means… Is it something you feel? Is it something you do? Maybe it's both… but some loser like me shouldn't know… because someone like me is hopeless… someone like me doesn't deserve kindness. I've done so many wrong things to hurt those poor people that I can't even keep count… in fact, sometimes I don't even know what I did wrong! It's so strange… it makes me feel horrible… but what do feelings count for? Especially for someone like me, who doesn't deserve to feel kindness._

_The second word I could never comprehend is that word "happy". I always thought it was to wear a smile, to play with friends, to laugh with others. I thought happy was when you felt so great that nothing in the world could bring you down. I thought happiness was when all your problems went away! Happy was supposed to be something you couldn't describe… ever! When somebody was happy it made others happy! Smiles would make more smiles, and frowns would disappear just like clouds disappear right after it stops raining. That is… happy… isn't it._

_But… I have no right to talk about that either. When I smiled I was never happy, when I laughed it wasn't real, I played with no friends… I never have had any. When other people smiled… I cried… my problems never went away; my smile never appeared when other people smiled! No… no I smiled all right, but inside I still felt despair, loneliness, stress, hopelessness and weakness… all at the same time. I was constantly under pressure, constantly under grief, constantly scared that I would do something wrong… that they would make me cry again… so I just… faked… faked my smile, faked my strength… I faked everything! So who am I to be talking about such a beautiful word? How people can say that word and not think of how powerful it is… is just so incredible to me._

_They know what that word means, I wish… I did too. _

_The third word is "friend". That word is a funny word… friend. I have so many mixed feelings about that word. I always thought that a friend was someone you could trust, I thought a friend was someone who said "You're a great person Naruto, I'm glad you're my friend". I thought a friend was someone who protected you when you were in trouble, who defended you when you're being attacked. I thought a friend was someone that tried to cheer you up when you were down._

_You know… it was so close. I almost thought I had a friend, I though that I could finally be proud of calling someone my friend, but then… I found that all I did was burden them… from a certain mission, or a certain plane. I found that I always got in the way. I was no friend to them… but they didn't consider me to be there friends either… they never cheered me up… they never cried with me, heck, for all I know they didn't even care if I was about to die! So… that's another word I don't understand… another word that I probably will never understand. But, I don't deserve to anyway. A burden like me doesn't deserve friendship. _

_The fourth word just struck me… as I heard it just moments before. That word, "love", that one word just… I donno know. I heard that love was doing anything for a person. I heard that love was kind, that it didn't envy anybody, I heard it never vaunted itself, I heard it did no seek her own, that it wasn't easily provoked, that it bared all things, hoped all things, endured all hardships with another person. I heard love never failed. I heard that one word was so powerful that people would actually sacrifice themselves for another. I heard that love was a feeling so powerful that you couldn't describe bliss it gave you. Love was supposed to be so great that receiving a kiss from somebody was the greatest thing in the world. Hearing an "I love you" would bring so much happiness to another person. That just loving was enough to make you feel secure…_

_But… what is this love? Nobody ever did anything for me. I guess I was too much of a burden for love, I guess I provoked it to much. I guess it just couldn't bare me. It never did seek anything for me. I guess I failed too much for it. I never have received a kiss, never have heard an "I love you". No one ever sacrificed anything for me. I never have felt secure._

_What is love?_

_Love?_

_I hate that word… because it will never love me. _

_How could I ever get love? I don't even love myself! I hate myself, I hate my look, I hate my actions, I hate everything about me. Why shouldn't I? Everybody else does._

_I don't have kindness, I don't have happiness, I don't have friends… I don't love…_

_You know… maybe… I… do have a friend. _

_Pain?_

_Yes! Pain!_

_It was always there for me! _

_That day I cut myself… I felt… good. It felt like I had all the pleasures in the world. _

_The blood… it looked so great…_

_My blood… _

_I want to see more! More… of my blood!_

_Haha… how stupid of them, look! They put these needles inside my body! I could – let me take one. Wow, it's – ouch – so sharp – ouch – my blood! It looks so happy… that it's leaving me._

_Let me… just cut… a little further…_

_Ugh… it hurts, but just for a second… but that's nothing compared to the – to this sensation. It feels so good… like… it's accepting me… like it wants me to be with it. It feels like someone finally… finally likes me. Let me just cut… a little deeper…_

_Look! The blood is running down my clothes now… just like that last time… but I don't care! Someone… is finally accepting me. I'll let this be… my friend…_

_My friend… everybody else's enemy…_

_*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*_

She was shocked, was he trying to do it again? She watched, eyes wide… mouth open in dread, as she saw his blood dribble down his clothes and trickle on to the floor. Every drop that hit the ground sounded in ear loudly, like a bomb hitting ground. 

He looked at her… he was… light-headed… but not like last time. He was smiling this time, a different kind of smile… a smile he never wore before. It mixed confusion, desperation, loneliness, and acceptance all at once… this smile. His eyes showed the same… except it looked as if… as if he enjoyed watching the blood leave his body. 

That is what scared her… his eyes. They were so dull; they were not the blue shining eyes she was used to… they were dark, very dark eyes. Those eyes… were what made her not move… they were what made tears come to her eyes.

That wasn't Naruto… no, not the person she saw. The Naruto she knew was always confident, and though he was often obnoxious, ignorant, annoying… he was still Naruto, the boy that she grew to know. 

Then again… did she know the real Naruto? What kind of hell was Naruto living in? He was a demon? She would probably have been doing the same long before Naruto did. How could it have been? Always in fear that somebody would try to assassinate him at any time, always scared that what ever he did was wrong… that he lived in constant failure. 

Sakura's tears slid down her eyes. How could somebody live without being able to come home to a family? To never hear an "I love you"? To always be mocked and despised just because they said that he was something he wasn't? It wasn't right. Maybe… that's why he tried suicide. Because of people… people like her.

She was the same as everybody else, she abused him… there was no doubt about it, and even though it wasn't physical abuse… it was sure mental abuse. She could remember, as a kid how she called him names and despised him just as all the other kids did. She mentally kicked herself for doing this; she just wanted to be in the group of "popular" kids so every time she found them insulting him she did the same. She guessed it became a habit… kids follow there parents example, and after seeing that her parents hated the boy… she had too… do the same. Well, she didn't have to… but she wanted too.

And that past habit became a future habit, which continued to be a habit… until just three days ago. That's when she noticed what that can do. Never did she know what kind of emotional stress Naruto went through. Reading that poem… she was shocked, such melancholy thoughts, such a bad outlook at life. He really… deserved better, much better.

Sakura stepped into the room and slowly walked toward the bathroom in where she grabbed a small rag. She turned the faucet on and felt the hot water run down her hands as she soaked the rag. She carefully wrung out the rag and approached Naruto as slowly as she could… not wanting to frighten him.

"Please… stop, Naruto" Sakura whispered as she caught his arm. She held it as softly as she could, she didn't want him to… react like he did last time. "Please stop it," Sakura pleaded taking the needle out of his hand. He turned his head toward her, the way he looked. His eyes watered, is smile disappeared. Only a look of despair and anguish remained on his face. A look that Sakura could never comprehend… something she DIDN'T want to comprehend. 

He began to cry.

Something… 

Sakura wasn't used too.

Something…

Sakura didn't want to get used too.

Maybe… someday – someone – could help him. But who could Naruto trust? He tried to trust some one… but they only treated him like dust.

A single tear rolled down Sakura's cheek.

"Naruto…" Sakura sighed as she started wiping the blood from his wounds. The blood soaked into the rag changing the color red. There wasn't much else she could do, but she could at least be as kind as she could… even if… he did cry.

"Why Naruto, Why?" She stammered over herself as she looked at his face. Was kindness what he needed? Yes… but there was more, and that, Sakura was unable to find. "What do you need? Why can't you become yourself again!?" She tried to speak softly but was unable to do so. He… the way… she couldn't… what was it that he needed? Couldn't someone – anyone give it to him?

He was sniffling now… she new it… he was going to cry harder now. She wanted to hug him, she really did, but he would accept her. This crushed her; all she could do was wipe the blood from wounds that he himself created! Tears rolled down her own eyes now, "Can't you… at least tell me what you ne--," 

"He needs acceptance, Sakura…" A boy responded to her question even before she had finished, "He needs, kindness, he needs love, he needs happiness… he needs someone who can give him that."

"Sasuke!" Sakura cried as she rushing over to hug him. He accepted her hug. Somehow Sasuke had managed to pull himself over to the hospital. He felt tremendous guilt for what he did in the hospital just days ago.

He looked over towards Naruto, he stopped crying… because now she wasn't there… she couldn't hurt him… or so he thought she wanted to hurt him. Sasuke sighed… he should have acknowledged him earlier… when he… had the chance. Now he couldn't even train without thinking of Naruto. Even Kakashi told him to go visit Naruto so he could clear his mind. 

Sasuke watched as Naruto attempted to take out another needle. Sasuke pointed it out to Sakura who ran to take the needle away. Sasuke frowned and he saw the boy begin to cry again… what could he do? Or… what could he believe? This weak person in front of him was not the Naruto that he considered his rival, this Naruto he saw was just… helpless.

Helpless…

Like Sasuke once had been… when his brother, Itachi Uchiha, killed everyone in his family. It took him years to get over it, how long would it take Naruto?

He had to admit… he was worried about the boy. That boy was his teammate… that boy… was his friend.

"Naruto," Sakura said looking at Sasuke in a serious manner, "He is… that fox."

"What?!" Sasuke snarled, "Is that why the people want him dead?"

"My mother… hoped that he would die…"

"I was surrounded with people who asked me if I thought he would… try… again."

"But Sasuke! He is not really… that fox, is he?"

"Well, it depends on who you are," Sasuke began to explain, "The people see him as that demon because they don't want to except that it's gone. While you… and *I*" he said the I almost with a hint of a blush out of embarrassment (he was admitting something that he would have never done!), "see him as a friend because we know… he is Naruto, not the demon. It's kind of complicated."

"I see," She frowned as she starred at the boy, "I never knew… people could be so – that people could live so much in the past – it's now… Naruto is Naruto, he is not the fox… he is OUR Naruto." 

Sasuke only shook his head.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Ah, home at last," A cheerful chuunin sighed in relief. His last mission turned out to be a tiring one. He had to travel all the way to a different country and bring a special note from a different Kage. "Oh, hey Kakashi!" He waved as he saw Kakashi approach him.

"We have a situation, involving Naruto," Kakashi said starring straight into Iruka's eyes.

"Oh no, what did Naruto do now?" Iruka sighed as he sat down on a bench, "I was hoping I could actually get some rest today."

"Well what he did might shock you," Kakashi looked up to see the clouds. Even he, at first, couldn't believe what Naruto had done.

"Well, spit it out," Iruka frowned.

"He tried to…" Kakashi sighed, he knew, when he told Iruka, that the news would be hard on him. Iruka did hold Naruto dearly, so dearly in fact that he would have called Naruto his son any day. "Naruto tried to…"

"Well!?"

"Naruto tried to commit suicide…" Kakashi said softly.

Iruka shoulders sunk, "Your… he did… no, Naruto didn't do that… don't joke around," Iruka tried to laugh it off, it wasn't true.

"No, he did… he is in the hospital right now."

"No…" 

-End Chapter 4-

WWWWWWAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! I finished chapter four. A little shorter then usual, sorry people! The next one will be longer ^_^. I don't think I was completely satisfied at this chapter, but hopefully you like it. As Always R&R.

By the way here is the timeline so far.

Chapter 1-2: Day 1

Chapter 3: Day 2

Chapter 4: Day 3


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- Sorry for the long wait of this chapter, I'm really busy these days… but no problem… you can always expect an update from me, I ALWAYS FINISH MY STORIES!!!! Isn't that a good thing? Hehe…

Ah and by, the way the stanzas at the beginning are from "The Castaway" By William Cowper… a pre-romantic poet… the poem tells of a person who died lost at sea, he compares this of how much of a struggle it is to get out of his own loneliness and despair when he fell into deep depression. However do to the length I put only the last two stanzas… if you would like to know the whole poem then just email me or put it in a review and I will gladly send it to you.

"Speaking"

_(Thoughts)_

***other peoples writing***

****Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

**Chapter Five**

**I therefore purpose not, or dream,**

** Descanting on his fate,**

**To give the melancholy theme,**

** A more enduring date:**

**But misery still delights to trace**

**Its semblance in another's case.**

**No voice divine the storm allayed**

** No light propitious shone,**

**When, snatched from all effectual aid,**

** We perished, each alone;**

**But I beneath a rougher sea,**

**And whelmed in deeper gulfs then he.**

_Why? Why do they keep on doing this? They took all the needles away… Why? I felt so…accepted. It seemed for that one moment… when all that blood was leaving me – I felt like people were finally happy. I felt… as if… the world was finally for me… not… against me. I felt like they… loved… watching the blood roll down my body. It felt like… someone was actually saying "you made the right choice, go deeper and deeper, you're doing the right thing!" That feeling felt… so… different, something I've never felt… before. That feeling… it made me want to… just keep going… deeper and deeper… I wanted to see more blood. I still… want to see it._

_Why can't they let me do something… right? They always told me "You're doing this wrong" or "I wish you'd actually do something right!" Wasn't I… doing something right? I felt so… accepted… I had to be doing something right. _

_Why!? Why!? Why… can't I have that feeling? Why can't I have love? Why can't I have Friendship? Why can't I have kindness? Why can't I have happiness? Is life… just -- am I just – I'm so confused! Are things always this way? Or is it just me? I can cry like I am doing now… but that doesn't help, it never has! Crying never gave me compassion or friendship or happiness… it gave me nothing! It just gave me – me! _

_And…_

_What am I good for?_

_I'm good for nothing. Just… a crybaby; All I do is just… cry! I hate it! I hate it! I despise it! Cry plus relieve is equal to nothing… All I get out of crying is despair. So… why can't I stop? Because… despair is… me? Am I everything that represents wrong in this world? Am I just some worthless ship sinking to the bottom of the sea? It... i-it sure feels like it. _

_But those moments… when the blood was leaving my body… I didn't feel that way! I felt so much different. So indescribable… why… did I feel that way. Why did it feel like I could finally have a good sleep without the nightmares or melancholy thoughts. Just that… if I could only have that feeling back… I would – it would – I dunno… I would feel – I could maybe cry… differently. I could finally know that Naruto Uzumaki did something that everybody was glad about. I want to do it again… but how?_

_Since nobody will love me, since nobody will give me friendship, since nobody will be kind – Why not! Why can't anybody love me! Why am I always crying, why can't I have that feeling anymore. It was so happy to see my blood leave –I was so… glad to see it leave. The deeper I went more blood escaped… I felt tired… but that feeling was great. The more tired I got the more pleasure I felt._

_But… who am I to have that feeling? I deserve what I am… I deserve to be alone, I deserve to cry alone, I deserve not to be loved, I deserve not to be befriended… that is my fate. A guy named Neji said that my fate was already decided… I guess… he was right. _

_I tried so hard! I really did! I wanted there friendship! I wanted anything they would give me… even if it was what was left over. They… didn't give it to me… but I didn't deserve to know any of that anyway. They were right, I was wrong… like always. Nobody wanted me though… they never did. I wasn't right for the; this was what I was right for. But… I don't like it. Every moment I think about it – it – I –I'm – I cry. There's no other word for it. Bawling, tears flowing, crying… it's all the same. It's what I am._

_All I can do is to stay huddled up like this and cry… but… that feeling… what was that feeling? I want more! More! More! More! More! More! I want it! I don't care what gives it to me!_

_But…_

_All the needles are gone though… they want to see me suffer. They know I deserve to suffer. Me, Myself, I deserve to suffer… every little bit. Because of me people scream, because of me people fail, because of me people are unhappy. It's all because of me. If I wasn't here… it wouldn't be like that though. If I wasn't here nobody could hurt me… nor could I hurt any of them._

_Instead… _

_I could…. Get that feeling back. I could have that feeling without anybody trying to take it away! Maybe that could stop the crying! Maybe that could give me comfort… the comfort I've never had. The comfort I've always wished for! I could… be with *my* friend. I could be with the one that encouraged me to do one thing right! Wouldn't that make people happy? Wouldn't that make the people – would that make love… love me? Would that give – would it take the confusion away? The heartache, the pain, the deceit, and the loneliness away; maybe… it would._

_I could finally be… me… without having to be… to be… them. Maybe… the blood… or maybe… pain will let me... be me; Just me… the Naruto that's Naruto. _

_If nobody else will…_

_Then…_

_I'll…_

_Just stay alone…_

_And…_

_Huh?? Alone. Alone. Loneliness is the essence of alone. And that *alone* brings despair… and misery. And it's' even worse when… when you nobodies there to help you in any way. They… left me alone… completely… in fact… they never were there for me. _

_How then?_

_Was I born? Am I a mistake on this earth? I never had any parents, never had any brothers or sisters, I've never had anybody. So I guess that's what… I have to be… alone. Alone in this world, alone in the next; what's the point of me? Should I – maybe – because in the other world no one will be there! There will be no one to hurt me, no one to say bad things about me! I won't be a bother anymore…_

_But then…_

_Nobody… would be there to comfort me either. I would never have anybody._

_But…_

_They were never there anyway… so why does it matter. At least the other world will accept me enough to not hurt me… or insult me. Nobody will look down on me anymore… I won't have to see those angry eyes anymore._

_I guess… that's the way it has to be…_

_So…_

_I'll do that… at least… I can make… them… happy._

_*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~_

Hinata knew that Naruto's condition was getting worse and worse. He hadn't eaten anything for the past four days nor had he drunken anything. He was becoming weaker and weaker by the second. No matter how much the nurses tried to make Naruto better he just wouldn't let them. All he did was roll himself into a ball and cry. This Frustrated Hinata a lot. She desperately wanted him to get well. For the last four days all she did was think about him. She couldn't sleep because she was constantly worried about him and right now she made her way to the hospital to see him.

Sakura had passed by her house in the morning. Hinata couldn't believe it when she heard that Naruto was cutting himself. Hopefully today he would be awake, though. Maybe he needed somebody to say "I love you" to him in order for him get out of his depression. Besides, she did… love him. Why did she? She didn't know herself. Was it the strength he showed? No… it couldn't have been that, she still loved him… even while he was in the midst of his depression. Was it how he looked? Well… some of it was that… he *was* so adorable! To Hinata at least… either way she didn't know what it was. He just – something just captivated her. Just seeing him made Hinata's heart race.

But she wasn't concentrating on that now. She wanted to get to the hospital. She was very disappointed that her parents wouldn't let her go see him the day before. That was why… she was running. She wanted to see him… like never before. *He* needed *her* now; she had to do something. Anything! She couldn't bear the thought of him staying like that. She wanted to see his eyes sparkle like the use too; she wanted his confidence to return! Most of all, though, she wanted to hug him… no… she wanted to love him.

When… he didn't accept her hug… she was crushed. What could she do… what did she have to do to let her hold him… to comfort him.

Maybe today… she could do that. She knew Naruto needed those three simple words. She was sure those three simple words would do something in his life he could never imagine. Well… she hoped anyway. The poor boy… he needed acceptance… and Hinata… wanted to give him that acceptance… that love. 

Hinata took especially care of making Naruto's favorite dish. She was holding it in her hand as she ran. Instant ramen, she new the boy loved that. He was sure to eat that… he had to eat something… he was becoming weaker. He needed to eat… really. A person can only go so long without eating.

The day was especially bright though. Hinata didn't like this… rain was supposed to be appropriate for days like this.

How could she understand what Naruto was feeling? If rain didn't even care to show up for… what the heck did? Rather then… her. Sakura and Sasuke were good friends… but they knew Naruto wouldn't respond to anything they did. What made her think that she could do anything? If the two people closest to Naruto couldn't do anything, how the heck could she do something?

Of course… they weren't the closest to Naruto. Iruka-sensai was like a father to the boy. Hopefully he would give Naruto a visit. That would always be good. If anybody could do something it would be Iruka!

"Ugh!" Hinata dropped to floor dropping all the ramen she had carefully prepared for Naruto. "OH! The ramen!" She looked to see who she had run into. "Sasuke-kun! I-I'm sorry, I was in a rush!" She said with a small bow… and rushed on her way.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sasuke walked beside a melancholy Sakura. Both were going to visit the hospital today. Since training was done and all affairs were taken care of for that day they decided to waist some time with Naruto. Still Sakura couldn't get over the frightful image that happened the day before. He was trying again… for the second time… or maybe, he wasn't trying it. The way he looked at the blood… his eyes… his smile… frightened her as well as Sasuke. 

Sasuke for one had never imagined Naruto would wear such a face. Those dark eyes, that dark smile… it didn't completely frighten him… it rather, gave him a certain uneasiness that he had never felt before… the same uneasiness he felt when his darn brother killed his family. In a sense… it wasn't the friend he had come to know. Sure… he knew that it was Naruto, but… it wasn't the same Naruto that had become his friend, companion, and rival.

For the first time Naruto… was showing his weak side, his real side. The side that nobody ever knew about him… or ever cared enough to find out. That alone sickened Sasuke… sure he went threw emotional stress losing his family and all… but… he still had that kindness and love that everybody needed. He *had* a family… and he was hoping to one day revive that family.

But…

Naruto… never had a family. He never knew what it was like to feel love… even from something as simple as a family. And even while he was growing up – even while he tried to get that love from somebody… nobody would dare return it. Why? Because he was a fox? Yes, there was no denying it, he WAS the fox, but he was still Naruto. He controlled every action, every thought, everything he did was Naruto! Not the fox. 

That was something Sasuke couldn't never understand.

They slowly made there way into the hospital to see a distressed Hinata. She was going from doctor to doctor, from nurse to nurse asking them if they had seen Naruto. Sakura ran over to see what the probably was. 

Hinata immediately froze when she saw Sasuke, "D-didn't – w-weren't going the opposite way of me when I last saw you?"

"huh?"

"Oh no!" Hinata said running out the hospital… followed by Sasuke.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Naruto had single handedly tricked everyone by using henge to turn into Sasuke. And here he was, at the place were he first became a ninja.

He sat there, huddled up kunai in hand. Blood rolled slowly down his hands and onto the floor. Not only there, his legs, his arms; all were dropping the precious fluid, were each puddle ran together making a large pool of red about three feet from him. His smile was the same, his eyes were the same… except this time… no one was there to stop him. 

And that… 

He took advantage of. 

Allowing as much of blood leave as possible, he felt lightheaded and tired. He felt his energy leave is body slowly minute by minute. He… just… didn't care. _So what? I'm being accepted… just by that alone. _ What was he losing anyway? Friends? Family? He had none. And while he had the chance he wanted the blood to leave… because the more that left the better he felt… the more the blood was happy… the more the people were happy… the more he was… being… accepted.

And…

If that was the only way to gain acceptance then it was alright with him. If he couldn't get love, or friendship or anything else… then he would stay with acceptance… besides… that's all he really wanted. Though he couldn't lie about it… he wanted everything else… but… he couldn't have it… and would never have something as precious as that. 

He lowered the kunai in his hand to his right wrist. One place he hadn't cut yet. _This is the place… I felt so good when I cut here._ He began slowly cutting into his wrist. He winced, the pain was a bit worse do to the scar he had from the first one. He didn't care though; it would be over soon… the feeling would be so much better.

Naruto stopped for a second looking up. Two ninja's had come across him. He froze. What was he to do? They were laughing… at him and they were coming… closer. The smile they were wasn't a nice smile. It was a smile Naruto knew well. Flash backs of kids beating him race through his mind. They hated him… The kids… because… he was different… they… hurt him… because he was different. 

But…

Every kid was different right? Why was he the exception?

One ninja whispered to the other. The other then turned towards Naruto and spoke to him, "I know you. You're that fox kid, aren't you?"

No response.

"Hmmm, speechless are you?" The ninja starred straight into Naruto's dull eyes. "Well," the ninja turned to the other, "Why don't we give the village a present?" he said as he averted his eyes back to Naruto.

"Why don't I help you with those wounds?" The ninja stared deeply in Naruto's eyes with a grin. He advanced toward Naruto and picked him up by his collar. Fright was apparent in Naruto's eyes as he came closer and closer to the ninja.

He knew what was coming…

The ninja kneed Naruto is the stomach. The shear force of the kick made Naruto cough out blood as he slumped down on his knees holding his stomach… tears apparent. The second ninja charged at the defenseless boy kicking him in the head and sending him sliding a couple feet on the hard ground.

Naruto didn't move… 

He knew…

That if he moved they would just hurt him more. Yet, if he stayed still… they would… eventually stop. That's what they always did.

Naruto prepared himself for another blow.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hinata ran through the streets of Konoha village. Where was Naruto? He had to be somewhere in this village. Where would she be if she was Naruto? But she didn't have to ask that… she knew where he was… she knew what he was doing that made her run faster.

Arriving at the practice field where they all became ninja's she stopped in error. Her heart raced as she saw Naruto pinned to one of the three tree stumps. Two ninja's stood there beating him as hard as they could possible.

Sasuke rushed passed her racing toward the two ninja's that attacked the defenseless Naruto. With sheer anger Sasuke kicked one of the ninja's into the hard stump killing him instantly. With outrage he turned to the second one, who shook with fear.

Naruto backed away, obviously injured. Hinata took a few steps toward him… but stopped.

The ninja glanced at his now dead friend and growled as he turned back towards Sasuke, "He was defenseless, you're not supposed to do that!" He screamed ready to attack.

"You attacked Naruto while defenseless didn't you," Sasuke said calmly as he approached the ninja, "So why should I give you or him a chance?" Sasuke pulled out a kunai and got ready to attack. 

Before the ninja could even react Sasuke had already but the kunai through his throat. He picked the ninja up and threw him at the other ninja's and with rage he continued to drag the kunai across the dead ninja.

Naruto backed off in fear as he saw what the boy was doing. Sasuke turned toward the injured Naruto and approached him.

Naruto screamed backing off.

"Naruto?" Sasuke questioned.

Naruto fell backwards but continued move backwards has fast as possible. He was scared… scared that Sasuke would do the same to him as he did to those other two ninja's. His breathing become deep, rough breaths (which was not good due to his injuries), and he began to cough and wheeze at the same time. His heart beat tremendously fast… too fast.

But what could he do? He didn't want that… Sasuke… to hurt him; his breathing sounded painful and he was slowly losing consciousness.

Sasuke came closer.

Naruto's breathing became rougher…

"Stop Sasuke," Hinata called. 

The boy backed into her arms. For the first time she hugged him… ignoring the blood. She took her opportunity… maybe it would… calm him down. "Come on Naruto," she said still holding him in her arms, "Calm down…" She said hugging him as tightly as possible.

He turned to see who had him.

"Hi- Hinata" Were his lasts words before he drifted into unconscious… She slowly got up and carried him to the hospital.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hinata watched happily as she saw Naruto. He woke up moments before. But that wasn't what she was happy about. Naruto… said her name, this was a great sign! Even though it was small… it was improvement. It was improvement…

Hinata left the hospital with new confidence that day.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Iruka entered into Naruto's room, in his hands and bowl of ramen. The doctor said that the boy wasn't eating… at all. Iruka decided to make it his every attempt to make him eat.

"Naruto," He said softly, "I brought you ramen."

No response.

He just sat there… peering out the window with a dull expression… back… deep into his thoughts. What he was thinking Iruka didn't know. But… he knew he was in serious pain. Not only from the wounds! A far greater pain… one that… maybe… could not heal.

He sighed, "Naruto come on, just one bite," he pleaded.

Nothing. 

He just… nothing… did nothing! What kind of memory was he in!? Why did he have to collapse into this? Trying to commit suicide!? What happened to him? Naruto… lost it…

No…

Naruto never did have it.

All his life he lived in nothing but solitude. Nothing but pains and hurts, what good could he think? Worse off… only… a few cared; Iruka knew well that the town's people hated him. No… not for what he was… but for… what they thought he was.

it was sad… painful… and sad. A boy that was robbed from al his joy… a boy… who never had any joy. Did he have a choice but to commit suicide? What could a boy who knew no joy live? It made perfect sense why Naruto tried that vile act. That was why… he cut himself… because… he wanted acceptance.

But… didn't Iruka acknowledge Naruto? Doesn't that count as acceptance?

Tears began to roll down Iruka's eyes. Was what he gave Naruto not enough? Or… maybe… Naruto needed more.

Iruka left the ramen on the table exited the room. What could he do?

Naruto turned toward the ramen. Hurt he was. In pain? No doubt. But… he felt *better* today. He felt away from his thoughts… not as great as the feeling he got from seeing his blood… but nonetheless and small feeling.

He picked up the ramen.

-End Chapter 5-

SSSSSSSSOOOOORRRRRRRRRYYYYY For the oh so long wait of this chapter took so long. I just want to say thanks for your reviews, and remember! Check for the next chapter soon. I think I really liked this chapter. Anyway, remember R&R! Tell me all your thoughts, the good, the bad, the emotional, whatever! I want to hear them. 

Till next time!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- Well people, we arrive at chapter six. I hope you guys have enjoyed the story so far. It seems Naruto is getting a little better eh? Well we'll have to see as the story continues. Anyway, I hope things are seem realistic… I'm not sure how I'm portraying Naruto right now… do you think it would be better to keep the "beginning" thoughts of Naruto… or to go right into a story? Well it's up to you!

Happy Valentines Day all! Hope you enjoy it! Find a girl or guy, ask her or him out, and have some fun! It's always good to have some fun… especially on valentine's day… when certain games come to mind…*Thinks of spin the bottle* XD. Well anyway… enjoy the chapter!

"Speaking"

_(Thoughts)_

***other peoples writing***

****Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

**Chapter Six**

_Life is odd. You believe one thing, but after so long… you see… that the belief you had was wrong… totally wrong. I had a belief once. I thought… that I could make friends… I thought… that people were kind… and helpful… and great… and friends. Then, though, I got the real message. They didn't want me. No matter what I believed, no matter what I did, they hated me. They still hate me. For what I am, for what I do, for what I look like. It's funny how it is… isn't it? How one person is accepted because he's good at this and that… but the next person that's just as good… is cast off… I believed I was just as good… I believed I *could* have been just as good. But… I wasn't._

_And I learned that when good old Frustration came into my life. Yes, it's been here a while, through my façade it was here. When I was younger it was here… it's still with me. Can I accept it? Yes! But… I wish I… didn't have too._

_I here the drops of rain outside… it's nighttime. The time when I feel the loneliest I can. This is the time I'm really lonely. In the day… I could always watch them… I could always see the sun. Sure… it frowned upon me, but… that was ok… because… at least other people were happy._

_You see…_

_When I see that there happy… I want to become happy, and I think I've found away to do that! That's why… I hid this is my jacket… when those… two people came. But I don't understand…, why did it hurt me when they made blood come out… but when I do it… it feels… good? I guess… because… they do it because they… don't want me to have that feeling… they want to make… me…_

_When Hinata had her arms around me… when I was close to her… it almost felt… like that feeling I get when I cut myself. It was so strange… I felt so – what she said, how she said… I almost thought! I thought… that… maybe… I wasn't alone. I didn't – I seemed – I thought… she wanted me there… with her. The way she spoke… the way she looked… even with the small glance I had… it didn't look like the way other people look at me, she – it seemed – didn't look at me that way. Her eyes… they looked as if she actually… cared about me._

_What was that feeling?_

_Why?_

_Why can't I have that feeling more often? Why do I have to feel pain before that feeling that I'm looking for. I wish I could have that feeling without the pain. But maybe… that's the only way I can have that feeling. Maybe I was created to have that feeling with pain while others can enjoy it without pain._

_I know why… it's not secret anymore. It's because… *I* am created for pain. I was the one that shouldn't have been here, I was the mistake! That's… all I ever will be. A mistake! Something people should never have to love… something they never have to love. The thing people don't have to respect, or be kind too, or be friends with. I the one that's a shame! I'm the person *no-one* wants to be with. I'm just a shameful *creature* --wait! – I'm not even that! Not even a creature! You can't even call me a beast!_

_That's right!_

_Because… Beasts – at least there respected! Some are even loved! But not me… because I'm not worth love. I'm not worth anything. Nothing at all! I'm just sinking to the bottom of the sea… and no one is there to save me! In fact… the sea doesn't want me either! It would do something to get me away from it! Because nobody wants me…_

_But then… why? Why did *she* look differently at me? Why did her touch feel different? How… could her touch feel different? Why would she want to touch or have anything to do with me? A disgrace, a shame, a mistake; what part does she – does anybody want of me?_

_I was a created mistake… and I'll probably always be that…_

_But that's ok!_

_As long… as there happy… and as long as I have this… it's ok with me. Because… because… this actually wants me! With every drop that this allows to come out… a new feeling comes through me! It's like something that I have never felt before; it's like… accepting me. Well… maybe not that… but at least it seems to be that. I really don't know what "acceptance" is, but whatever that feeling is… is okay with me! Because… I think that's what I want. I don't know though… I'm still not sure…_

_But O well_

_They stopped me before. But this time I'll cut here again. This place felt the best… except this time… I'll do it on the other wrist too! I wonder what both will feel like. Why do they always take it away from me? I mean – or – maybe they just… want me to… not feel that feelings. Because there scared! Because they hate me! Well, why should I care! I'm leaving them alone…! Can't… they… let me have that feeling at least once without stopping me… just for a little while?_

_I'll cut right now… nobodies here… and I don't think anybodies coming soon. Right here – oohh – that hurt… more then last time… but the blood is coming out the same! And it feels the same! Let me go to… the other wrist… and slowly rub it with the kunai… I wonder how it will feel. Just… slo – oww – it hurts… but… not that badly._

_Wow…_

_There's more blood coming out on this side… then the other side. Why? Maybe… I should cut deeper on the other wrist. Besides… the deeper I cut the better it feels. Well… that's how it's been…_

_I wonder why, though…_

_Sure, pain in my friend… but it seems odd. Just a little bit ago I was complaining about the pain… but now… I want to have it in order to… get that feeling._

_Well…_

_As long as other people aren't mad… I guess it's ok… because… I guess… I'm worth something to myself…_

_But that's not bad is it? That I think I'm worth something. I mean… even if my own blood doesn't want me… or my own soul doesn't want… I still can want me… alone… right? Cause… I'm not mad at me… I know I do a lot of stuff wrong… and I'm a mistake… but, I still can like myself._

_Besides… all I want is – what do I want? I don't know… I just want… just want… to be happy… I just want… love, kindness, and friendship. _

_But just because I don't have that… doesn't mean I'm not worth something… even if it's only me who thinks I'm worth something…_

_So…_

_I'll just take what I got… even if it's watching my own blood runaway…_

_*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*_

Tsunade sat grumbling to herself over a large pile of papers. Right now… she hated being Hokage. Why? She was stuck here signing a bunch of papers that were all likely stupid not needed policies and crap while Naruto sat depressed in the hospital. She was quite fond of the boy. Especially since giving Naruto her necklace, he still… did wear it. Naruto did promise he wouldn't take it off until he became Hokage… she took him for his word; which resulted in the problem… Naruto… was depressed. Not just depressed, suicidal! Which meant it would probably be a while before he took it off. She mentally scolded herself because even though she was a doctor she had never ever… seen a patient like Naruto. 

Of course, she had scene suicidals before; sure she had seen cases of depression before; but she knew… she knew that Naruto's was different. He… wasn't like the other cases she had. Her other patients had parents that loved them, friends that they could rely on, love, affection, they thought they never had. Naruto, however, never did have any of these. Growing up he had no parents, no friends, no love, no affection, no kindness. The poor boy had nothing.

How do you work with that?

It was no wonder Naruto was suicidal! Tsunade didn't know how to work with that. A boy with nothing; sure… she knew that he *now* had friends… and she knew that somebody may have even loved him… but… it was probably too late for him. 

That was the whole essence of suicide! Make the person believe it was too late… that nobody cares… that everyone hates you. Suicide wants you to think that you are a nuisance, or that the mistake you made was something that was punishable unto death. PEOPLE COMMIT SUICIDE BECAUSE OF THAT! Naruto… he… always had that. Everything was a mistake… everyone hated him… nobody cared about him.

How!?

How could you fight that!? If people make minor, stupid mistakes and commit suicide… what would someone whose whole life was, in essence, a *big* mistake? How was he able to bear his life in the first place!? Tsunade couldn't imagine the struggle Naruto had to deal with. No-one absolutely no-one should have had to deal with that. But… Naruto… did.

Tsunade sighed, what a poor boy. Even after showing himself worthy of praise and love and friendship… people still… hated him. If only they could have stopped living in the past. Tsunade knew that the past hurt… it hurt everyone… even her, but to put the blame on someone who did not deserve it… such people… were so selfish. Selfish beyond imagination!

Still… she couldn't figure out why the people isolated there kids from Naruto. They were very lucky! Lucky that Naruto became what he was… and nice, bighearted, caring boy… who when he finally couldn't take it… just… isolated himself... among the people. Any other boy would have probably tried to get revenge… especially if they knew… that they were a demon. Why they had seen it before! It was lucky Naruto never became a Garaa. The people didn't look at that… all they thought about was how Naruto was still that demon. Sure… he was that demon… but he showed control… he showed that he was… really… not that demon… that he was a person… just like everyone else.

So Selfish… Even she… for not going to visit Naruto, was selfish. She couldn't blame herself though… Hokage held huge responsibility.

Tsunade, however, found herself screwed up with other problems. Even… though she wanted to see Naruto and encourage him… she couldn't right now. She would have to deal with Sasuke… who did… kill two people. She felt for him though… in his position she probably would have done the same thing. Still it WAS murder.

Tsunade stopped rustling through her papers the moment Sasuke entered. She showed him to a seat in which he only showed her a glare. 

She started, "Look Sasuke, I know you want to Naruto to be safe but… you can't go out killing people at will."

"What else could I do!?" He screeched, "They were going to kill him! I gave them what they deserved… death!" Sasuke showed more emotion then he had ever done before. And why not!? Why not manifest all his emotion, especially why not to the highest person in all Konoha? He didn't care if others knew that he actually thought of Naruto as a friend! Especially now! 

Naruto was a brother to the boy! Except… this brother… was the brother he always wished to have! He… was no killer! He was actually someone that Sasuke *almost* looked up too. Not that he would ever admit that, but Naruto did encourage him… well… a little. Sasuke… didn't want to see Naruto down… he would of rather suffered through Naruto's stupid tricks and dumb attitude… than see this… new Naruto.

He had to accept it though. The Naruto that was now… was the… real Naruto. However… he knew Naruto. Naruto was still the strong person who would never go back on his word… even if he was… down right now. Sasuke knew that right when Naruto snapped out of it he would become even stronger then he was now. 

Though… doubts plagued his mind; even though he knew Naruto would become stronger if he got out of his depression. You see… there was the catch, IF, he got out. That scared him a little. Yes, scared him. He had been through the same thing; it took him years to get over it. Now Naruto faced with it… but he… was... he never had… a family. 

No… Sasuke would keep killing people if he had too… especially… if people kept attacking… his… brother.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"What's going on?" The blood of a girl swam down her arm making it completely red. Fearful she was… rather not because of the blood… but because she held the object which set free the precious life source. Scarier even, was when she felt herself move to her other arm… slowly. She tried to stop herself! She… had no power to do so. What was wrong? She watched herself cut slowly into her wrist, desperately trying figure out what was happening. Why was she doing this?

Her mind suddenly imagined her past failures and mistakes. Why!? She didn't want to think of that? What was this feeling? It felt as if the whole world had betrayed her. She continually rubbed her wrist… the wound becoming deeper… and deeper. She watched almost in tears as blood began to slowly surface her wounded arm. Worst even… something made her… not want to stop. Her mind… didn't want her stop… her physical didn't want to stop. Why!? She wanted to stop! Or maybe… her soul… didn't want to stop.

She looked around desperately thinking of what she could do. A faucet lay right beside her. "Get up! Get up" she screamed to herself. Why!? Why did she make no effort to reach the faucet while trying to make an effort? She was… trapped inside… trapped inside her mind with bad thoughts. Even… while she protested… she… for some reason felt a… smile… come upon her… almost… as if she was relieved that this was happening… but why? She wasn't relieved! She wasn't happy. It was like another person was moving her… or controlling her.

She was… she was… committing suicide? She felt herself sigh. Her body was giving way… she was growing tired… she was growing sleepy… but she felt good? Her mind was wondering off. _No_ she thought… she was losing consciousness… she was dying… and she… liked it. She felt something…

No!

She had what she wanted! A family! Someone she loved! Great friends… what was wrong with her… why was she losing… consciousness? Why did… her body… her mind… not care? Why was she smiling!? What was the weird feeling she had!?

It was become dark…

She was… dying?

Her eyes were closing… 

She blinked… trying to stay awake…

She felt the knife cut more and more into her wrist trying to let more blood escape. _Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop! Stop! Sto…_ her eyes closed…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Knock Knock Knock Knock. Sakura woke up to the sound of someone knocking on her door. What happened? It was all a dream? How weird. She put her hand up to her head as to rub it. She… tried to commit suicide in her dream. Luckily… it *was* just a dream. She sighed; everything that was happening to Naruto must have gotten to her.

She got up and walked toward the door still thinking of that dream. "Sakura!" Someone hollered. It was Hinata.

"Hinata?" She questioned Opening the door. Hinata's shallow breaths told Sakura that she had ran all the way to her house.

"I-I'm sorry, but I was wondering If you could come and see Naruto-kun with me…" Sakura saw she was carrying flowers… most likely to replace the ones she had left a few days before. 

Sakura smiled. Hinata was so kind to Naruto. She could see it. The way she acted around him, she really loved Naruto. Maybe… she would be the person who would make a difference in Naruto's life. Maybe it was she… who would be able to give Naruto what he needed. Besides… Naruto enjoyed being with Hinata… and he always spoke well about her. Much better then any of the other people.

"Ok, Hinata," Sakura said with a small smile, "Let's go." Maybe… she was the one… who would help Naruto… the most anyway. 

Both girls scampered toward the door.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sasuke watched Naruto cut deep into himself. He sighed making no attempt to stop him. He would just make matters worse. If he approached that boy… who knows what he would have done. For all Sasuke knew Naruto could have panicked and stab himself in the heart out fright. Though unlikely… Sasuke didn't want to take the chance. So instead, he sat in a small chair of to the side.

Maybe… he should have gone to get a nurse. But he didn't think that would be a good idea. He knew everybody hated Naruto, and even if a nurse was a nurse Sasuke still wasn't sure if she would treat Naruto right. He had to be careful… especially after some one tried to attack him just a day before. Though Tsunade reprehended him he would have a killed anybody else… if they… dared try to…

Sasuke turned eyes too Naruto and watch the pile of blood accumulate on his hand then drop to a smaller pool on the ground… this time… though… both hands. He couldn't see why Naruto would dare smile? And the smile he wore… something that Sasuke had never seen from him before. Something told Sasuke that smile… was… not Naruto's true smile. Something told him… it was a smile of… false hope. His eyes… also showed the same; dark blue… almost black eyes… not the eyes he usually wore. They were… sorta scary in a sense. 

How do eyes do that? You can tell when something is wrong or not… just by the way eyes are. It so weird in a sense… it's so… freaky how even the people who never frown… eventually break down. Naruto did! He was as happy as they came… the liveliest person Sasuke ever saw. What a shock it was when he saw him lying on the floor that day! It was all a façade!? His strength? His energy? Everything? Just some made up Naruto that so eagerly sought attention? So eagerly sought attention… but so anxiously awaited it. All of it failed miserably! No matter what he did, no matter what he tried, it… always… failed!

Hinata ran in the room and took the kunai out of Naruto's hand and soon after embraced him while Sakura ran to get a rag to stop the blood flow. Sasuke sighed as he saw the way Sakura looked at him.

Naruto looked up at Hinata… looking dreamy. He heard Hinata call for a doctor. Naruto looked up at Hinata… the concern face she wore puzzled him. Why would anybody have concern for him? Odd…

The boy almost began pouting as soon as the doctor started to exam him. He had no doubt lost a lot of blood… and the doctor had no clue when Naruto had started cutting himself that day… but by the way he looked and by seeing how much blood was on the floor she was certain that he had done it a while back. Even worse… was the fact that Naruto had done this for the third day in a row… it was getting way… out of hand. 

The almost unconscious boy wrapped his arms around Hinata… what did he want that he couldn't have? Or what did he want… that… they didn't know he needed. Hinata didn't mind the tears that soaked her clothes… just… the way… that Naruto cried. He shouldn't be crying… he should be laughing… or smiling… or talking… but… he was crying. What ever… could have been going on in his mind? What thoughts of despair? Or what thoughts of comfort? 

Sakura sighed… that dream. She new what… was going on with Naruto. The despair in his mind… the mistakes in his mind… the comfort he gained while his own blood flowed away from his body. The smile of relief, the continual want… to cut deeper and deeper. It's what really kept Naruto going… knowing that he could be able to get that feeling back day after day. The feeling… that… Naruto so desperately needed from a person… was shifted to something… pain give him instead. Ironic as the trickery of the devil; when God seems so far away… the devil seems like he is so close… and can give you… what you need… when in reality it's the other way around. The lie consumes you… leading to something far worse then you could imagine.

What a lie! What a lie! When some one thinks his life is a mistake! When some one thinks he is valuable to no-one! When someone thinks that pain is the only resort to life… when suicide lies to be the only way out. 

Naruto… was caught in that lie. The lie that pain brings relief… the lie that suicide is the way to go! The lie that takes hold on someone… when… nobody is there to hold and comfort that person… a person believes that… when in reality… it's just deception. 

Sakura could only stare at Naruto… who was no unconscious… in the arms of Hinata. Could Hinata… could Naruto's friends… give him the love and support he needed? Or would he stay shattered for ever?

-End Chapter 6-

WWWAAAHHH!!!! Hooray! I'm finished of chapter six! I'm not sure I like this one as much as chapter five… but it will do! I don't think I put as much angst in it! I spent a lot of thought on it though! The next chapter will come soon! Thank you for your reviews everyone! And I hope you will read and review this chapter as well! If you have any suggestions or ideas that you would like to see added to this story… don't be scared to tell him me! I'm always open to suggestions! Well till next time; which will be very very soon!


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- As you can see… there are some Naruhina hints, however, I don't know if there will be any romance in the story. If I do… it will be in the later last chapters of this story. Since Naruto is depressed he really doesn't care for romance right now… even though he craves attention and love. To make the story more real to life… you'll either encounter romance and the end or very end of the story, you will find slight naruhina, or you will find none at all. There might be some at the end, but like I said… I'm not sure.

Enjoy!

"Speaking"

_ (Thoughts)_

** *other peoples writing***

Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_Shattered_

By: Morgri

** Chapter Seven**

_I wonder… if other people share the same things as me. The loneliness, the despair, the helplessness, the misery; am I the only one that feels this? Have others… had the same feelings as me?_

_I wonder…_

_Did I do this to myself? I wanna believe I didn't, but… the world out there… it seems so convincing… it must… be my fault that nobody ever understood me or liked me or talked to me. The world is so cruel. Cruel beyond my imagination; I want to believe that there is some good out there, I really do. But I can't. The world won't even let me love myself. It won't let me do anything… that I… like. It never did… so why should I believe that it ever will?_

_I often try to imagine what it would be like to have a family. I watch other kids get along with their parents… and such. I try so hard to imagine my mom, my dad, and even my little sister that I might have had! But I can't! I can't imagine it… because I don't what it is like to… have a family. How can I imagine something that special? I'm don't deserve something special like a family… everybody says so. They say it because they hate me! _

_But…_

_They deserve to hate me. Everyone of them deserve to hate me! Because I'm not worthy for their respect or kindness or love, I'm just worthy of their hate! That's why I never had anything! That's why I was trying to stay alive during Christmas while I watched other kids have fun with there… parents! That's the reason. I wonder why I could never see that!? It was right in front of me…_

_Or maybe…_

_I did know the answer… but… I didn't want to accept it. I lied to myself saying, "Maybe some will like me if I act like this!" I acted like an Idiot that whole time… and maybe… even made everyone hate me more._

_Isn't that Ironic? Trying to be someone you think everyone will like… but it just makes it worse? It's like the whole story of my life. Something bad always happens. It always did… and it will continue to. I have to live with it though… or maybe… I should die with it…_

_That must be the answer! To die! It doesn't seem too bad. It's been a lot friendlier then life as been! I don't get it! Some many questions… yet so little answers, can my life get any worse? O wait… I forgot… my life has already hit rock bottom. Maybe it would… be better of I just went to a cliff and threw myself off. Ah! I picture it now! Everybody would smile as I fell. Then when I hit the bottom they would leave me there. They would probably declare the day a national holiday! They would exchange gifts and everything! Just – just because the nuisance, me, would be gone._

_HA! Bet that would be a relieve to everyone! Maybe I should consider doing that. Especially if… it would rid me of my pain. Or maybe – They took the knife!? Why! Where did it go!?_

_Why…?_

_Great… I'm crying… again? I thought… I wouldn't have to cry anymore. With that knife I could… take away the crying. But here I go again… the tears… I can feel them running down my face. I can… wipe them away… but… why? Why should I wipe them away if… they will just keep coming back. It's so… strange… tears do go away… for other people… but not me._

_I feel… uncomfortable. I don't know why… is it because I'm confused? Confused about all that's happening. I found so much relief in cutting myself… watching my blood flow away… from me. It seemed so happy, it seemed like everyone was actually happy that I was doing something. I couldn't see it… but I felt it. They were all cheering me on, they were all telling to cut deeper, to make more blood happy! I was so sure… so sure… that… I even… thought myself… that I was doing something right for a change. I… felt so good then… I still… want to have that feeling._

_But then…_

_Out of the blue… some one else just comes out and makes me have that same feeling… without the pain. But… does… or is she… just tricking me? Why is she… making me feel… accepted? Why is she giving me the same exact feeling that I get when I… cut myself? Oh! I can't think straight… I feel bad. _

_I… don't feel so good… today. My head hurts… and… I feel like I can't do much today. I can barely even move my arms today, I just feel like… staying here… and… resting. Then… I'll find something… to cut myself with again. It won't be too bad… just a little… maybe… I can find another good place to cut. It hurts more when I cutt at the same place now… and there are the really big scars there now. They hurt when I move my wrist… maybe… I should have cut in a different spot. But… it feels so good when I cut there! I can't help it…_

_Anyway… something is happening… I know it. The doctor… has come in a lot today, and nobody as come here to bother me like they usually do. Though… I don't know what time it is… I think it's almost allmost midnight. _

_I feel sooo… tired, but I don't want to go to sleep. I've been having really bad dreams. They scare me. Something happens in those dreams. _

_I lose control of my body… I can't do anything… my body moves on its own. My arms start to bleed… followed by my hands… then legs… then feet… but the blood… when it leaves… it doesn't feel the same. It feels… horrible. I then begin searching for a weapon… any kind of weapon… it's different every time. I scream… I dunno why. Then… I look down and this weapon is inside me; I stumble towards a mirror. What's happening? Why am I doing this? I try to take the sword out… but I have no control… I can't do anything. As I look in the mirror… my eyes… there different. There smaller, there a different color. They look like the eyes from a demon trying to get out… from something that has been him sealed for years! There blood red eyes, so scary! I soon feel myself slipping onto the floor… I gain control… but… my energy is gone. I can't feel anything… I struggle trying to find something… trying to find someone. But… I'm too weak to walk. I crawl… desperately making my way toward the door… but I can't... I wake up._

_Are those dreams… something that will happen in the future? And… why… when I'm bleeding… don't I get that feeling that I want? I mean… when I cut myself I get it. Then why not in my dream? It makes no sense._

_ *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*_

Something was wrong. A sudden gasp from Naruto told himself that. Not just that, his heart told in so also. The flickering, jumping, pulsing of his heart told him. It wasn't right… it felt like it started then stopped… then started then stopped. It beat at different times, faster and slower, faster and slower. 

Naruto clasped his heart. It hurt. He couldn't even scream, he only gasped. Or did he? It was too painful to tell. Was he gasping? Or was his breathing so shallow that the gasps were needed for air? Whatever it was… it was – he felt the most pain he ever had felt. His heart felt like it was trying to leave his body… by force.

He gripped a small bar that was to the right of his bed. He had to do something! What was happening? Why did it hurt? He didn't want it to hurt! He hurled himself to the floor. He had to get something… get someone to help! He found himself hard. If he could move… but he had to push himself… and it hurt… extremely. 

With one hand on his heart and the other on the ground, he began pushing himself to the door. Was he moving? It didn't feel like it. The sheer pain he felt while pushing himself was incredible. Never… never… had he felt so much pain. His eyes were burning, of tears partly, but something else was happening. Something – was he losing control? He felt as if all the rage he ever had was… trying to leave his body, trying to escape and showing no mercy to the body it was escaping from! 

Was this what rage did to a person? Consume him, devour him, eat his consciounce and soul, embibe his emotions, feed from his stress, and then when it is all over just leave? Leave with no compassion whatsoever? How… horrible. How horrible for something like that to happen. 

It was happening though… to Naruto. Every bit of energy… every bit of emotion that Naruto had was coming out now. Except… it wasn't his real emotion… his real strength or weakness or happiness or sadness or excitement or boredom… it was pure rage. Or… maybe it was not just rage. Maybe it was revenge as well. Revenge and rage… what could that do to a person? Especially to a person that… had held those two things in heart for years!?

Not only that! The harsh conclusion was… that there was also a demon in him. Except this demon… held rage that was more then five thousand years old! A demon… and a boy who only knew hatred… rage and revenge… what could be a more deadly combination? Could it be… that… the demon… the horrid fox was trying to escape Naruto? Or could it be… Naruto… just him…?

Naruto looked toward his hand, still feeling the excruciating pain, it was bleeding. What was happening? Tears formed over tears and he watched his life source drip away from him. There was already a large puddle next to him. How long had he been bleeding? Couldn't have been long… or could it? Naruto couldn't think straight. Did this follow depression? Was it his fault that this was happening?   
Depression…

He didn't like it…

He hated it…

He despised it…

He abhorred it…

But…

He had it…

And…

He… wanted it? Why though? Why would he want such a thing? Depression… nobody wants depression. But… depression… kept him away; Away from the people… away from the hate of the people, from the anger of the people, away from the unhappiness of the people. Did depression… in some way… soothe him? Why though…? All it brought was tears and unhappiness! It did! But… wasn't that the story of his life? Was that his… curse? Unhappiness? Everyone told him so… they all told him! They told him he was just a plain mistake… that he *WAS* supposed to live in unhappiness… that unhappiness was his role in the world.

Nothing more… nothing else…

Naruto stopped. He stopped everything he was doing. They were all right! Misery was is life! Why fight it? Why not just die right there and then. It wasn't like anybody *wanted* him alive. He could see it! See it in their eyes! They truly wanted him dead. All of them! He even… saw the same glare in his… teammates. The unhappiness that followed them when they where with him. There grumbling for a different teammate. 

Yes, he remembered them. Why though? What was the point of remembering them anyway? Even… if he did… want to see him again, they would probably just disregard him. Heck… they probably wouldn't do anything… they probably wouldn't have even notice his being there. But again… what would be the point? Couldn't he just die here and get it over with? 

He laid there… staring at his hand… watching the blood scurry to the floor. He took his other hand away from his heart and starred at it. It also… was cover in blood which ran down his arm and soaked his jacket. He left it drop in front on him. There was still pain. It hurt… it hurt a lot… but… could it bring the relief that Naruto so desperately wanted and needed? Or would it just… claim an innocent soul? Could… he… be happy… if he was gone?

A small sheepish… almost scary grin came across Naruto. The… pain… didn't seem to matter anymore. And now… the blood started to feel… better again. The large puddle of blood that lay before him… looked… nice again. Was death his ally? Was death his… friend? Naruto reached for the puddle of blood… and dipped a few fingers into it. He realized something.

You see…

This time… nobody was there. This time… there was nothing they could do. Because… this time… he wasn't doing it. This time… it was either Naruto who stopped it… or Naruto who didn't stop it. 

And right now…

Naruto didn't want to.

Because…

Death and Pain… were is friends… 

Because…

Death and Pain… accepted him.

Because…

They… wanted him.

Naruto coughed out blood. He still… didn't know the reason… he still didn't know why this was happening. His mouth felt like fire… and his eyes were burning… they were changing. Dilating? Yes… they were dilating, getting smaller and smaller. The pain was amazing… but Naruto didn't care. He didn't even… struggle for air anymore. And not struggling made the pain worse…

But…

Naruto wanted the pain. Naruto… wanted to die! It was apparent! He coughed out more blood and smiled. Smiled not because he was going to die, but, because of what he felt. He was tired… his vision was wavering, and even amist all that… he still had the nerve to smile at the now very large pool of blood that he was lying in. He smiled because… the liquid he was lying in wasn't cold… but rather… warm… something… he hadn't felt in a long time. Something… he wanted to feel. He smiled cause of the fact that now… his arms and legs were covered in the substance that people call blood. He smiled from the fact that nobody… nobody was there to stop him!

Nobody…

With nobody he lived…

With nobody would he die…

Just like… the poem he had written almost a week before. "To die alone," what… sad words; but, what was sadness to someone like Naruto? Especially now? Now that he was out of that sadness… now that someone – or rather something… wanted him? But of course! Naruto wasn't dying alone! His friend Pain was with him! Just like he told himself "His friend and everyone else's enemy"; What Irony! Something he had said was actually coming true! 

Was… that a reason that he smiled as well? The never-right was now right! More Irony! But this time, it was the type of irony Naruto wanted. A type of irony that Naruto needed! _Wow!! _Naruto thought to himself. He *was* right. Irony had now been ironized itself! Something never thought possible!

"Because… this time… T-They… were wrong," Naruto uttered under his breath, "Not me…" His smile grew. Scary as it was… it just became scarier. Happiness wasn't what he felt nor acceptance, just… a fake… sense… of relief. The relief he thought *HE* wanted. A fake sense of relief in a disguise! That disguise was acceptance! What disguise would come next? If the next disguise… was love… what… would happen? But worse! What if that disguise never had the chance to come? If it had the chance to come… then… maybe… his friends could pull him through the door that he was behind; However, if that disguise didn't come… then.... Naruto… would be another person that was once again tricked by death.

Tricked by Death and his right hand man Pain.

Naruto's memories rushed threw his mind. Memories of when Iruka first acknowledged him… memories of when he fought Sasuke… memories of his encounters with Hinata. Were these… really… his memories? How could he have even had memories? 

He didn't care though. Today was the day! Today was the day that he would be with his friends Death and Pain. They couldn't have been tricking him… nah! They were so friendly! Look! They accepted him! They gave him what he wanted! Wasn't this enough to prove friendship?

Maybe so…

Naruto smiled as he fell unconscious.

-End Chapter 7-

Oh my goodness! What is wrong with Naruto!? What is happening? Why did blood just out of no where come out? Why isn't anybody there to help him? Will Naruto die? Will Naruto live? How will Naruto's friends react when they find out what happened. Will they see him… once last time? Or will they be able to continue to work him out of his depression. Find out in the Next Chapter!

Remember to read and review people! Hopefully you liked this chapter! It was… shorter then the others… but intentionally written that way because the next chapter will be a special long chapter! A present from me for making you wait so long for this chapter. A lot of questions will be answered in the next chapter. 

Peace!


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- Hi Hi all! Thanks for you reviews and criticism! Criticism is always good… it helps you make your writing better. Though to much criticism… well you get the picture, anyway let me clarify something. As you know, Naruto has lost a lot of blood and some are saying the fox is "healing" him. Well… how do you think Naruto is still alive or… maybe now he is dead. Guess you'll have to find out what the fox is up too. Anyway… just so you know the fox is doing his work, this chapter will explain what happened… and… it will explain if Naruto… lived. =P

Enjoy!

"Speaking"

_(Thoughts)_

***other peoples writing***

****Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

**Chapter Eight**

Ring… ring… ring. The continuous sound of a telephone rang through Sakura's large house. "Hello?" Sakura asked in a tired voice, "Who calls at three in the morning? What? No… that can't be…! He's… not dead… is he? What do you mean you don't know!!?? What happened! What did he do… wait? You don't know what happened…!? You haven't seen him…? Who else knows…? Where are they taking him…? I'll be right there…! Ok… yeah… bye!"

What had happened? Sakura ran to her dresser as fast as she could. They were taking him to Tsunade… and she… wanted to be there. She opened her dresser and took out her usual apparel. She was tired… but… he was – no she couldn't think that! He was ok! He was ok! Nothing happened! It was just a big mistake… and he would be alright when she got there. What… had he done? What happened… all while she was asleep?

She looked at a picture that was on her dresser. It was her, Sasuke, and Naruto, all smiling. What was the feeling she was feeling. Sheer anger had overcome her! Was she mad… at him? She was! Taking the picture and shattering it against the floor proved so. "I hate you, Naruto!" She screamed, "I hate you, I hate you! Why…? You… weren't that bad… you… were…" she stuttered picking up the picture. Cold tears dripped upon it. When… did – he was always special. She knew it… but denied. He was… like family. And though… it took her a while to figure it out… he was.

It was... before this whole situation. When… she thought of him as family, though, she really never showed it to Naruto… she should have. Now she… might not have the chance to show Naruto what she thought of him. Over… the time they were companions… she really did learn to respect him… even… love him (in a brotherly way). Of course – well who knows what Naruto did this time; or maybe, he didn't. What if it was one of the town people… one of those savages. They probably would! He was already almost dead… now was the perfect time to take advantage of him! Now was the perfect time… to end his life. They wanted too… Sakura could only imagine… what… the people would do… if they found out that Naruto… was dead or almost dead. 

She didn't know though. Was he died? Was he alive? If he was… would he be ok? She could see the people now! They probably would ask her if he was dead or some crap like that. She couldn't believe… how they reacted. How could people be so evil? Especially to someone who never… did something to them. Was it human Nature? Who knows… but whatever it was… it wasn't right.

Sakura only sighed though; there was nothing she could do about it. And that's… what she hated. She could do nothing… nada… zero! She was useless. She though maybe just trying to be Naruto's friend would help him get better; but, it didn't. Was she that bad? Was she good or actually evil? It was sliding toward evil. How could it not? When Naruto needed her friendship the most… she failed; he protected her all those times… and when he actually needed her… she wasn't there to help him.

How could she do that to him? Why would she do that to him?

Sakura ran out the door heading toward Tsunade's Mansion. Luckily for her though, it was nighttime. There would be no-one to ask her questions, no-one to infuriate her, and no-one to call Naruto a… demon.

She wondered as she made her way to Tsunade's. Why did Naruto think suicide was so great? What did Naruto get out of it? A false sense of security? Couldn't he see how much more he lost? His memories, his friends, his own life; what was so great about that? Or wait… maybe… he didn't know he had friends. Nobody ever treated him like one, so maybe he thought… he was only… gaining a friend. Sakura shivered at the thought. Gaining a friend… that… couldn't be good. He was… not gaining a friend… or rather… he was… but he was gaining something else as well, acceptance. Or so it seemed, anyway.

The moon shone blood red. _What a scary color_ though Sakura. For the passed week that color haunted Sakura, what would it do now? She slowed her pace. Did she really want to see him? Did she really want to see a weak Naruto? Sure she saw him many times this weak… but… by the way the person on the phone sounded… it was serious. This time… it would be different. How different… she didn't know… nor did she want to know. 

The thought of Naruto being dead scared her really. Honestly, her, Naruto, and Sasuke lived as a team… she wanted to… die as a team. But not by some freak accident! She wanted to die of old age… and she wanted them… to die of old age. She wanted to live as friends; she wanted to die as friends!

She looked around, tears forming in her eyes. She stopped. Maybe it would have been better not to see Naruto… then again… if she didn't… what kind of friend would she be? Deserting him once more in his time of need, "I can't let that happen again." She murmured, "Not… to such – not to Naruto." She started walking again after a few minutes, quickening her pace minute by minute… until she began to jog slowly. Looking around her she saw the shops and houses of people who despised Naruto. She sighed, Naruto wasn't such a bad guy… he deserved none of what the people gave him.

Curiosity entered her mind though, what actually happened? They would have known exactly what happened if Naruto was cutting himself again… apparently… he wasn't. It must have been an attack… an attack from somebody who hated him deeply… who despised him. But who? All the towns' people hated Naruto… but they were scared of him, so it couldn't have been them, it must have been someone else. Sasuke? Shikamaru? Kiba? Someone who knew that they could handle him… or… maybe… it wasn't that at all. An allergic re-action? Nah, Naruto never had any allergies… or did he? Sakura didn't know. Maybe he did… Naruto never was very open about his past life. 

She arrived to the place where Naruto was held. Sakura was happy that he was being cared by the best doctor in the word, Tsunade. Surely she would know what happened… or what was going on.

Sakura entered. A trail of blood, obviously Naruto's, made its way from the front door and up the stairs. Was Naruto still bleeding!? Worse off, Sakura almost gave a loud shout at the quantity of blood she saw. She had never seen so much blood in her life! How could so much come from one boy? Sakura had wondered how Naruto stayed alive when he was cutting himself… but now… she wondered… if he still held a chance at living.

The blood was apparently fresh blood which scared Sakura even more. Thoughts of the day she found him lying on the floor almost dead ran through her mind. She still never forgave herself; and yet, she still couldn't see why she didn't. It wasn't her fault, it couldn't have been. Of course… she felt a little bit of guilt for going through his stuff without his permission. When she turned around… she couldn't believe what she saw. It scared her to death. The blood that went from his jacket and ran down to the floor, the pile of blood on the floor, and… his eyes terrified her. His eyes – it looked as if he had been starring at her the whole time she was there. He wasn't though; sliding down onto the floor told her so.

Maybe that is what she didn't forgive. As she walked out she found that there was a long path of blood leading from the kitchen towards his room. Almost like just what she stood before. She could have done something… but instead… she just went through his stuff like it was her own. How could she forgive herself when she did something like that? She was… so selfish…

How could she dare not pay any attention to Naruto? She just played around with his feelings at will, always ignoring him for Sasuke; who ironically, ignored her. Time after time after time she just called Naruto an "idiot" not giving any thought about his emotions or anything. Not his integrity, not his pride, not even his deep feelings and emotions! How much better was she then Gaara, the boy who killed people at will? Sure… she didn't kill people at will… but she shore did make Naruto *WANT* to die. How ignorant was she?

But now was the time to make up for it… now and ahead it would be different. She would totally respect Naruto. She would let Naruto know that she was his friend… she would let Naruto know that she loved him.

Sakura followed Naruto's blood up the stairs and into a large room. Sakura had never been to the living quarters of the Hokage so she was quite hesitant in opening the door that Naruto's blood led too. A small quiver overtook her as well, what was she to expect? The blood did little to calm her. Open it or leave? Open it or leave? What was best? Sakura took her hand of the door and backed up. She was still unsure. Naruto in is weakest state? That was… too much. She slowly walked to the stairs. 

She was running away. But why? Whenever she was in trouble Naruto was there! He always thought of her… and when she needed him… he was there. Why wasn't she doing the same? How could someone cower out in a friend's greatest time of need? 

She turned around and approached the door and entered.

Naruto lie on a table with his eyes half open. She approached Naruto slowly, he was breathing, and he was alive. His eyes revealed sadness, as if… he wished they had never found him. It was apparent he had been crying, a very small puddle of water told her so. "Naruto…" She started softly, "What happened." She didn't expect an answer. "Please tell me what happened." Sakura whispered. A faint laugh echoed in Sakura's ear. "Naruto?"

An almost devilish smile appeared on Naruto's face, "Naruto is dead." Sakura jumped in surprise as Naruto's eyes appeared different; blood red almost fox-shaped eyes peered at Sakura. It was almost if he was peering right into Sakura's soul. "He's been dead for a while."

"W-what do y-you mean?" Sakura stuttered. Fright overtook her as she looked deep into his eyes. Eyes of rage, eyes of hate, eyes of murderous intentions! 

"Sakura… help me…" Naruto blue eyes filled with sorrow and despair appeared into Sakura's view.

"Naruto…?" Sakura questioned as she once again approached Naruto. What was going on? What was happening?

"Sakura… help me…" Naruto's eyes formed tears, "Why can't… somebody just help me? I was… so close… I felt like something actually wanted to me. But now – now – I can't take it anymore. Sakura… help me…"

Sakura broke as she threw her arms around the boy. He was so alone… so desperate for someone. So desperate for attention, so desperate for acceptance, and so desperate for any other persons basic needs. "Naruto, I'll help-" Sakura was suddenly tossed to the opposite side of the room. "Wha…?"

"Naruto's mine!" Naruto was now sitting up, the red fox-like eyes once again stared right at Sakura smiling devilishly as he spoke. "You can't help him anyway. Aren't you the one that totally discarded him? The one that never even paid attention to him? How could you help him?'

Sakura frowned as she slowly stood up, "I did do those things, and they were bad things… I see what they did to Naruto, but I won't do that again. I will…"

"What makes you so sure?" Naruto cut her off, "Right when Naruto returns to normal you'll just treat him the way you did before."

"That's not true! I can help him!" Sakura screamed, "I made some mistakes in the past, but that doesn't mean I can't correct them!"

Naruto collapsed onto the table, visibly exhausted. He had been up all night, he had almost bled to death, how was he still alive in the first place? Sakura picked herself up and ran to the boy. Again she threw her arms across him… he needed that… he needed to know that someone cared, that someone was there for him. With a groan Naruto coughed out blood which for a second frightened Sakura. 

Something was wrong…

Sakura laid the boy on the table. Naruto's breathing stopped… it turned into immensely large coughs and hacks… almost as if he was choking… or as if he was trying to breathe but couldn't. What was wrong, what was wrong!? Sakura frantically tried to find the problem. "Come on Naruto! What's wrong? What's wrong?" she cried putting her head to his chest. 

A faint heartbeat, wait… no heartbeat? Naruto screeched in pain. Naruto's heart… something was wrong… what was it? Sakura heard the sound of his head once more… but it sounded like… it was… like it had no rhythm what so ever. Faster, slower, nothing, slow, nothing, fast; it had not pattern whatsoever. 

Why? Was it that demonic fox!? "Stop it!" she screamed, "Please! Leave him alone!" Sakura stopped in tears. He wouldn't listen to her… "Stop…" She pleaded. What would the team do without Naruto – what would SHE do without him? Although she didn't like to admit it… it was Naruto who she trusted most. It was Naruto who she… wanted to trust most. Life was so cruel and unpredictable. First thing you know you have two great teammates by your side. To you great teammates that would do anything for you… but then, you find that one is obsessed with killing his brother… then the other was suicidal AND possessed by a demon.

"Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!" She screamed as she felt Naruto's heart came to a complete stop. "Plea…" She murmured not finishing; what was the point? Naruto wasn't coughing or breathing, rather, he was unconscious once more. Sakura couldn't do anything… why did she always have to be the useless one. In faint murmur she called out for help: "Somebody, anybody… help!"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hinata scampered through the street. Why did Naruto try to kill himself again!? She thought that he was actually doing better… that maybe she had… gotten through to him; this time was still different though… this time it was really bad. Well, that's what she heard on the phone anyway. Why did bad things always happen to the people she cared about? It happened first when her father… she wasn't good enough for him. It also still seemed that she wasn't good enough for him. That made her feel useless… it made her feel that like no matter what she did… she was always wrong… she was always getting in the way instead of helping.

With Naruto it was different though. She accomplished things when he was there! And though they weren't great things in other people's eyes… Naruto still always cheered her on in everything she did! It was so… encouraging! When Naruto was there… she had confidence, she felt useful, and she felt secure! She felt everything she ever wanted to feel. In a way… she was like him… always striving for acceptance… with Naruto she had all that! And now… it was being taken away from her.

Why did have to be Naruto who was being pried apart by every townsman? He wasn't a demon… was he? He was just Naruto! Why did everyone hate him? What did he do to them? From the day Hinata met Naruto… she loved his company. Ever since then… she wanted to stay with him. She wanted to know him more. Every time she talked to him… he was… more amazing. Every time she saw him fight – in fact each time she saw him in general he was more amazing!

Hinata… she wanted it to stay that way. She wanted to spend as much time as she could with Naruto. A few tears fell from or face, not Naruto! He didn't deserve it. Why couldn't he have stayed happy? Why did he have to fall into depression in the first place? If only she had been there for him… if only she had told him how she felt earlier. This is where Hinata hated her shyness. Why did she always have to go shy in front of Naruto. She wished could have been like Sakura, Sakura was always up front with her feelings toward Sasuke, why couldn't she be... like that towards Naruto? 

But she wasn't… and she had to accept that. Just because she was shy didn't she couldn't tell Naruto her feelings; maybe if she told Naruto how much she cared about him he would get out of his depression, and it could go back to normal. Well… maybe not normal, but surely that would get take him out of his depression… even if it was just a little. Hinata was sure that she could give Naruto what he needed. She could give him love, she could give him acceptance, she could give him friendship, and… all those things… she wanted to give him! Nothing would please her more! As long as she was close to Naruto, she was happy! And… she wanted him to be happy! She – it was – she could – that was what she could give him! True happiness, what Naruto always wanted… what Naruto always needed.

Seeing Naruto cut himself… seeing him try to kill himself… it wounded Hinata… severely. She wouldn't be able to live without him! His smile, his voice, everything about him was what kept her going, and she made it her first priority to be with him. 

Remembering moments… she laughed. Not really a happy laugh though; but, a laugh of despair. The moments when she first met him, the moments when she gave the medicine… it all hurt her… because… she didn't want memories of the blonde… she wanted him!

Arriving to the building, she opened the door. Not slowly… nor could you say quickly. Frightened… and yet hopeful she entered. "Naruto," She sighed seeing the trail of blood which led through the hall and up the stairs. She knew it was his blood. What did he do to lose so much blood?

She found the door and entered…

She stopped frightened. He stared at her, and held her there, but – wait that couldn't been – no it was him… it looked just like him – What? His eyes… what… frightening eyes! Cold eyes, blood-red eyes, murderous eyes; those eyes stared at her. "S-Sakura?" She said stuttering, "W-what h-happened to Naruto?" She asked. 

Sakura gasped, he held her by her neck, he was choking her, yet… he stilled maintained his eyesight toward the shy purple-haired girl. "I-I-It" Sakura tried speaking, "Not Na-N" The boy gripped her tighter, lifted her up and threw her toward Hinata who was hit and thrown against the wall. Sakura rubbed her neck and got up, "That's not Naruto," She huffed, "Well… it is… but the kyuubi has taken control," She uttered. 

"What!?" Hinata queried bringing herself to her feet.

Before Sakura could answer Naruto was behind them. He attacked high! Sakura ducked and tried to trip him with a low kick. No good. Naruto back flipped and disappeared once he landed. Appearing in back of Hinata he tripped her then kicked her to the opposite end of the room. 

"Hinata!" Sakura screamed. His speed was incredible! His power was incredible! Sakura took a defensive stance and eyed Naruto making sure she knew what he was going to do next. Sakura drew a kunai. Although she didn't want to hurt Naruto she had to defend herself. Naruto attacked, with unmatched speed. Naruto dashed toward Sakura who, taking her chance threw the kunai towards Naruto – no good! Naruto was unharmed… and yet… the kunai was no where in sight. Sakura sprinted towards Hinata… who was frozen. The kunai… was… an inch from her head.

What happened? Sakura froze as well. She knew what happened. She threw the kunai towards Naruto who deflected it. He was… aiming towards Hinata who barely dodged. The speed of the kunai must have been incredible! Only the handle was visible! 

Still frozen. Fear had overcome Sakura and Hinata. Naruto took his chance. With a burst of speed he arrived fast, before Hinata even knew it, there was a hand in her stomach. Her vision blurred, she felt herself fall to the floor. Both hands held her stomach, pain had overcome her. So much that she couldn't even breathe. Beside her she saw her friend collapse into the same position she was in. The room span around her, she felt as if she was about to burst. "Na…" She couldn't speak… the pain was outstanding. She tried to look toward him, her eyes deceived her, she was looking at three, "Naruto…" She gasped finally breathing in air. 

The boy approached her and Sakura. Picking the up each by one hand he began to choke them. "This boy…" Naruto laughed, "Naruto… is dead! Maybe not on the outside… but on the inside he is!" his laugh subsided, "Do you know why he is dead on the inside? Because people like you made him that way! You guys did just what I wanted you to do! You see… all these years I was the voice in back of his head. I told him how much you hated him. I told him that nobody wanted him and that he was destined to live alone. I told him that he was just the idiot in the world, the idiot that was never right.

"At first he thought I was wrong. He thought that he could be right once… or that he could make a friend… or that he could find someone who cared about him. He even put on this stupid act. A façade that never worked, it was pathetic. While with people he acted happy and nice… but when home all he did was cry and relieve his stress by writing in his journal, mostly poems, but others where short stories about his life. 

"Finally he couldn't handle it! It was too much for him. The people, the hate, the deceit, the loneliness; he couldn't handle it anymore. That's when he let loose. He attacked you and your friend, not to harm you, though; he wanted the attention, he wanted to prove to himself that he deserved to exist, so he thought that by defeating you and that boy maybe you would have accepted him.

"When he came back to his senses he realized what he had done. He took both of you to the hospital. There I remember the stares and hateful looks he received. What Naruto felt was indescribable; and that's… were he cracked. 'No more' He screamed running home, 'I can't handle anymore!' When he arrived home I told him of a way out… why of course just rid the people of him; that would have made him happy. No more to worry about the cold stares, the hateful words, or the mockery; no more would he have to worry about being wrong or being right or being a nuisance or ruining things… because… he would be gone.

"Do you know what he felt when he cut himself for the first time? The satisfaction he got out of it? The acceptance that came with it? Surely you couldn't understand, you've always been accepted! But for Naruto that feeling was the thing he always looked for. It was what he always desired. Then you came into his life. You stopped him from gaining what he wanted… and he liked it. He thought that maybe YOU… could give him what he wanted without the pain. I knew he was wrong, I told him while he was bleeding on that cold floor… that you would just be the same as all the other times. You would ignore him and you would insult him. So he gave up… and that feeling he received from pain returned, and here we are now. 

"You know, he wouldn't be here if that dumb Tsunade wouldn't have gotten in the way. She had to visit him right there and then… and then stop the bleeding when she took us here. She coming back too… but I can't allow her to…"

"You," Hinata interrupted with a soft voice, she was upset, and "you… care about him too… don't you?" Hinata sniffled wiping a few tears from her eyes, "You… want him to be happy,"

"What?" Sakura turned toward Hinata, "That fox is the one that destroyed our village."

"But," Hinata ignored Sakura's comment, "I want Naruto to be happy too, except the difference between you and me… is that… I want him to be happy with me. I can make him happy, just give me a chance." Hinata approached Naruto, "I don't want Naruto to die, I want… him to live and be happy. I want to accept him."

"Silence!" Roared the Naruto, "It's all a lie." Naruto began hand signals. Using Kage Bunshin to turn into two Naruto's he took both girls by the neck and lifted them into the air. "You're lying," He yelled, "I will… kill you!" he tightened his grip on both girls. "You can't help Naruto… only I can do that! Now die!"  
His grip was outstanding. More powerful than anything Hinata had ever seen. But she couldn't give up… no… she wouldn't ever let Naruto die! She still had things she needed to tell Naruto, she still had many things she wanted to do with Naruto. With all her might she tried to release herself from his grip.

She couldn't…

She failed…

Unconsciousness began overtaking her…

Naruto…

Naruto…

"YYYAAA!!" 

Hinata felt the grip on her neck leave and fell down to the ground. Sasuke was there, and though Naruto dodged his kick he was still able loosen Naruto's grip both girls. Sasuke stared long and hard at Naruto before speaking, "What's up with your eyes dead last? And why were you attacking our friends?" The tone Sasuke used was much more of a sarcastic voice then serious; however, he stood ready to guard both girls in case something (which it seemed) was wrong.

"O goodness!" Naruto screamed furiously, "Can't you people just stay away from Naruto for one second!? I'm not explaining this anymore!"

"Whoa… hold on Nar…"

"If you care about this boy so much, then prove it!" He cut of Sasuke, "Hit me once and I will leave the boy alone. You won't see me again unless he invokes me? Prove to me that you are willing to make sacrifices in order to save this boy." Naruto smiled as he continued, "Because there is a catch. I will use every bit of this boy's energy while fighting, so you better fight smart because you only have a little amount of time." He readied for attack, "And believe me, I will not hesitate to use it all up!" He started.

Faster then the blink of an eye he arrived dashed toward Sasuke. "Hmmp," Sasuke said using sharing an, "I can see you," he smiled, dodging a punch.

"But can you see three?" 

"What?"

One Naruto caught Sasuke by the arm and slung him toward the punch of another. Sasuke slid to the opposite side of the room due to the force of the punch; such… tremendous power. Sasuke lifted himself up and was joined by Sakura. "How did he…" Sasuke was cut of by another attack from Naruto. Dodging the attack barely, he countered using a low kick to trip Naruto.

I didn't work.

Instead Sasuke saw Sakura fly to the other side of the room, she hit the wall hard. "What are you!" Sasuke screamed searching for Naruto. 

"What's wrong?" Naruto laughed as he ran in circles so fast that it appeared as if four Naruto's surrounded him. "It's just one hit."

"Grr!" Sasuke gathered chakra into his right hand. With his left hand holding up his right the chakra began swirling and dispersing to different positions. The Chidori otherwise known as the Raikiri swirled and dispersed in his hand. He charged towards Naruto. With relevant ease Naruto dodged the attack. The power the attack left a large whole in one of the walls.

"Your attack form is great, yet you use it in stupid situations," Naruto instructed, "I'm to fast for you, you waste your energy."

"We'll see about that!" Sasuke screamed with rage charging was again with the Chidori.

"I told you it wouldn't work" Naruto screamed and caught Sasuke's arm, "Now you will pay the price." Naruto shifted Sasuke's arm and slowly directed towards Sasuke's head. Sasuke groaned as he tried to move it away… Naruto's… or the fox's power… was almost ten times him strength.

"Sakura!" 

"TAKE THIS!" Sakura screamed! While Naruto wasn't watching she took her chance to take a swing at him.

No Good…

He caught her arm also…

"Now you will both die," Naruto smiled has he used his other hand to pull Sakura towards the Chidori. Both closed their eyes as Naruto spoke, "Naruto can't… Gah!" Naruto snarled.

"You care about Naruto too, but why… why do you want him to die? If you really cared about it him… wouldn't you give him that chance… of life?"

"You…" Naruto gasped. Hinata had hit him. She had hit him in full blast with her byakugen while Naruto had his attention turned towards Sasuke and Sakura. Naruto sighed and smiled, "Maybe… You can help Naruto after all…" 

Naruto fell into Hinata's arms unconscious…

The fox was gone.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

What a harsh morning. It was seven and Hinata smiled as she saw the boy rest. It seemed it was the fox who tried to kill Naruto, but not because he hated Naruto, but rather (in an ironic sense), because he wanted him to be happy. How did Naruto do it? Wasn't the fox a reckless beast that killed people and destroyed towns? Well… not that he didn't try to kill them… but that was different, Hinata would have probably done the same thing… especially if someone was trying hurt Naruto!

Tsunade was able to take care of Naruto. It wasn't good that he had lost a lot of blood, but it was good that that demon was still in him. By the looks of it… the demon would be able to supply Naruto with the blood he needed and as time would go by Naruto's blood flow would return to normal.

The fox gave Hinata a chance to help Naruto. How would she be able to do it? Looking down at the boy she wondered. Would he still be depressed when he woke up? Or would he snap out. She could only hope for the best… but looking at Naruto that moment… she felt compelled to… kiss him…

And that's…

… Exactly what she did.

-End Chapter 8-

Finally! This took me three weeks to write! Gah… and I still feel like it wasn't a very good chapter. Well anyway, thoughts? Good bad? Remember R&R and especially remember that the next chapter will be out soon. I wonder what will happen. Oh by the way… I think this answered some questions about the last chapter. I hope it did in a sensible manner. 

Hmm… the fox was good? We'll have to see… you never know.

Morgri


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- Wassup everyone? It's tuff writing depressing fics… because you either have to be depressed to write one… or you have to have a rrrreeeeaaalllyyy good storytelling ability. I'm not sure in which I fall… but o well! I hope you enjoy this chapter. I was hoping I would you surprise in the last chapter… not sure I did. 

Anyway!

Enjoy!

"Speaking"

_(Thoughts)_

***other peoples writing***

****Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

_ Shattered_

By: Morgri

**Chapter nine**

_I never thought that the fox wanted to kill me. I feel really nervous now… what if he tries to do it again? I mean… I thought I wanted to die… but, I'm not to sure anymore. It kinda of scared me… I don't know why? First thing I know I'm wanting to die and the next… I want to live. I guess that's what you get from a screwed up person like me… indecisiveness. I'm so tired of it! I can't never think right anymore! Tired of it all! _

_So… why didn't I choose death? Why didn't that fox kill me? Can't the people see I'm a hopeless case? It's just not fair… but I guess I've said that enough now. Life is not fair… so I should get over it… but, as much as I want to… I can't. I can't because all these people just keep on reminding me of my faults and failure, even now, right after woke. I may not of heard them or saw them, but I felt them, and I get the feeling that… they don't want me here._

_But, I guess I've said that enough. I could end it. I could get that kunai or knife… or whatever is sharp and just jab it through my heart. Why don't I? Why do I hesitate when I can be free afterwards? I guess the fox… was sorta doing a favor more me… like as if he knows that my deepest desires are to die. I just don't get it. Death and life, wants the difference? I'm hated here, I will probably be hated more after death… it seems likely. It just what I was created for, nothing I do can change that. Not my victories, not my writings, not my fake smile, or jocular attitude. _

_I tried to make them laugh. It seems that instead of laughing with me… they laughed at me; but not because I was stupid, but because – but because I was me. They were laughing at me – in fact… it wasn't laughing… it was ridicule. I am the fox… the fox is me… they were ridiculing me because the fox had no power anymore because he is – I am weak; hence, the fox has no power._

_But the fox has changed… or so I think. Maybe back then… he was… horrible; but now – a while back, he wasn't like that. He leant me his power, he helped me! I guess… it's just because I am weak, that's why I have to use its power. I'm not a good ninja, I'm not like Sasuke who graduated at the top of his class, one who is of the highest genins konoha, and I'm not like Neji who learned techniques he shouldn't even have been able to learn. But why compare myself? I never have tried to be as good as Sasuke. I knew I would never be able to._

_But who am I to try to defeat such a skilled ninja? I don't deserve his respect… as a ninja or as friend. For one moment… I actually thought that people liked me. That was when I fought Gaara… Sasuke mentioned that he didn't want to lose his "precious comrades." Little did I know, then, that he only meant Sakura, not me. I actually though I was fighting for a friend! How hilarious! Yes… hilarious to think that someone would actually consider me their friend, and even more… that I actually believed that they were my friends. I should have known from day one. It was only self-pity that I got to become a ninja. Wait, scratch that… I'm no ninja. I'm just a fake teammate… just one lousy scoundrel looking for attention… attention no deserved._

_What am I saying though? I know I have a special bond with that fox. We talk. He told me that someone saved me from him. That… he was going to kill me to get rid of the pain. Sure… I didn't want to admit it; but, I did want to die. I pleaded to that fox – I pleaded to God to kill me. I was better of dead anyway… and… I was about to get my wish. Someone stopped me though. Did someone… think… that I was better off alive? Did someone cherish ME enough to fight for me? That thought is heart-warming, the thought of someone enjoying my company enough to fight for me… enough to risk their life for someone like me, a demon._

_I once heard an expression that went something like this: "Everyone has at least one friend, even if they think they don't." Well… it was something like that, I can't really remember. Friend… I thought it was dead to me. Then began to cut myself… believing that I did have a friend. How stupid of me! Thinking that death would bring me a friend. I always heard there was an exception to every rule. I guess I'm the exception to that phrase. Though, my heart aches to have one! It does! If I had the chance, I would befriend Gaara! At least… I wouldn't be alone. _

_Insomnia… that's what Gaara had. I had it too. Crying put me to sleep, nightmares woke me up. Sadness put me to sleep, fear woke me up. It got to the point were just being noticed wasn't good enough anymore. I wanted love! I wanted a friend! All I could do was dwell on those to things! I didn't eat, I couldn't! I didn't wan to! I wanted friends – I wanted relief. Someone… I wanted someone who could… who could…_

_Stop! Stop it Naruto! If you keep on you'll cry…_

_Cry…_

_Cry…_

_So what!_

_I – oh! I'm crying now… I knew I would… but oh well – I wanted someone who could just…_

_Oh what am I thinking of!!_

_I wanted to be selfish!_

_I want love, I want friends, and I want attention! I want it all! I really do! I still want it. When Kyuubi, the fox, told me that someone fought for me – he didn't tell me who it was that did – I was almost… how should I say it… happy? In fact! I almost smiled! How ironic! I almost… felt those words… that… I said I could never understand. Almost! So close! Yet… so far away… maybe, though, just maybe… I'll actually have something to look forward too…_

_Maybe I'll get to be selfish for once…_

_Maybe…_

_Just maybe…_

_Tears won't seam as bad anymore._

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A little while before, Tsunade had given Naruto a journal since he never got his older one back due to evildoers robbing his home. Naruto accepted it, although he sorta yanked it away and retreated from her presence as fast as she could. Tsunade smiled though. She knew a journal would do him good. Sakura, a little time before, entered once again to his apartment to read the journal, she told Tsunade about how fascinating Naruto's writing actually was. She said his short stories were almost unmatched! Though, they did seem to deal with melancholy themes. Tsunade, however, smiled as she watched Naruto write from afar. 

She, knowing Naruto's present condition, thought it would be better to move him from the hospital all the way to her living quarters just so she could keep an eye on him. Naruto was… very mysterious in his own way, yet… so easily understandable. For sure! It was easy to see why he was depressed. However, Tsunade didn't want to dwell on that… she was just happy to see him do something that he actually wanted to do.

Luckily for Naruto, Tsunade decided to give him some space. She put no cameras in his room, she gave him the farthest possible room from everybody that she knew didn't like him, and she warned that if anyone dare do anything to hurt the boy an any way (mentally or physically) they would be dealt with severely. She even stressed the severely. All in all, Tsunade thought that Naruto would be rather happy with what she gave him.

Naruto had been unconscious for three days. And even after waking up his stamina was of the lowest she had ever seen of Naruto. Of course, healing was a long process, and she didn't expect to see him well fast. Surprisingly though, Naruto, (after about the second day of being awake) welcomed her into his room, as well as Sakura, Hinata, AND Sasuke. Of course… he did keep some distance, but Tsunade knew why and made nothing of it. 

Tsunade couldn't watch him all day though, and that was what she was worried about. She couldn't tell anybody to watch him… they all hated him… well apart from Iruka. However, Iruka was gone. With great struggle, Tsunade ordered Iruka journey to the Sand, which agreed to make a treaty to again supply peace to both villages. She knew that it was a mean thing to make Iruka go, but… she had too. Every other Chunin was of on other missions and she couldn't afford to send any ninja's higher then a Chunin.

She was amazed at how Naruto could somehow make kunai almost appear out of nowhere, and Naruto couldn't afford to lose anymore blood then that which he had already lost. Tsunade had searched endlessly for donor, but nobody had Naruto's blood type… he was truly authentic!

Watching Naruto, Tsunade could have sworn that he had already written in half on the journal she gave him, she sighed; she would be getting a lot of those for him. That was one thing she DIDN'T like about Naruto. This would… be an expensive couple of weeks. A smile appeared on her face as she saw Hinata scamper into her house and shyly greet her. Hinata agreed to watch him that day; and Tsunade soon heard that Sasuke and Sakura would soon be over as well. Naruto… did need friends. And hopefully Naruto would find out… that he did have some.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Ninety percent of Sasuke's day was either training in order to defeat his brother or how is brother killed his family. Today, his train of thought was what the fox had told him. His rage got the most of him though… which almost killed both him and Sakura. With his hands in his pockets, he paced through the highly populated street. He was sickened though. How do people learn of all the bad stuff? Once again, everyone asked him if Naruto was dead, or if he thought that Naruto would try to kill himself again; this bothered him extremely, and if it weren't for that warning that Tsunade had given him he probably wouldn't have hesitated in killing one or two of 'em. 

Speech surrounded him on that very subject though. There was nothing he could do about it, rather then laugh in there faces once Naruto snapped out of his depression. He looked forward to that, and a small smile followed by an almost inaudible laugh proved it to him. Ha! Who would get the last laugh then? He could only imagine the great time he would have while watching on the people return to their miserable lives once more. O! He could just imagine their faces when they would see Naruto run out and around the streets, doing back flips, and commenting (or rather screaming) on how much he loved life, all at the same time!

But the thing he most looked forward to was kicking Naruto's sorry butt for getting depressed in the first place. How ever was Sasuke supposed to become strong enough to defeat his brother if his rival wasn't even worth fighting!? Would he even be able to call Naruto his rival? He still did… look forward to "smacking" Naruto around in a friendly "training match." The conversation would go something like this (as it normally did):

"Dead last, I win again"

"YOU WERE JUST LUCKY!"

"No, I'm just skilled"

"Lucky"

"Skilled"

"Lucky"

"Skilled, and your not!"

"SASUKE!"

Just like it used to be, even a couple weeks felt like eternity to Sasuke. Especially when all the town people were somehow hoping that Naruto would die and get out of there lives. Well he had two words for them! "Screw you!" he shouted… and maybe one more word added, "Screw you all!" Everyone looked at him puzzled, but… he didn't care! The pleasure he took from it plenty satisfying.

Sasuke was on his way to the Hokage's Mansion. Like he told Hinata, he would be there; however, he was going to pass by Kakashi's house before entering. Kakashi had told him to keep in eye on Naruto… Kakashi cared about Naruto too, but he was far too busy to be able to see him like Sasuke was able too. So Sasuke agreed tell him how Naruto was day to day.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Embracing Naruto as a greeting, Sakura arrived to help Hinata. Though Naruto flinched at first, he gladly accepted the hug as soon as he knew she wouldn't do anything to him. Sakura and Hinata were planning to do something special today. Something that they hoped would be the first step in breaking Naruto from his depression. Sakura was a little disappointed to see Sasuke arrive late.

So what was it that they were gonna do? Sakura and Hinata had planned out the whole day! First, they would all go eat Ramen, followed by getting a large amount of ice cream. Sure it wouldn't have been very special if it was a normal person, but this was Naruto! If they could get him to see that they really loved him, then maybe his depression would slowly collapse!

Hinata had already reserved a couple seats from Naruto's favorite ramen shop, and the owner had told her that he would not allow anyone else there until they finally left. Hinata wanted to make sure the day went perfect, she didn't want Naruto to see any evil glares or unkind words, she just wanted him to… be happy. Maybe… even see him smile.

With a smile Hinata took Naruto by one hand and Sakura took Naruto's other hand and they led him out. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A sensation came over Naruto; he experienced something he never had before. He gazed into both girls eyes. They didn't have angry expressions, they didn't have disappointed looks; rather, they were smiling at him… as if they accepted him… as if they wanted him to be in there presence. A feeling – something different from the times he cut himself, different from the feeling that death gave him; it felt like – it was something Naruto… something… hope?

Hope he never had?

Just from a smile?

"We have a surprise for you Naruto," Both girls spoke softly and smiled at him sweetly. "Let's go have…" They stopped in the middle of their sentence, surprised. Naruto was… crying. He covered his face trying to hide his tears, trying to wipe them away.

_These tears… they feel different… _Naruto looked once again at both girls, who still smiled. Naruto was tugged out the door, but instead of leaving alone this time… he left… with something different.

Friends.

Naruto, looking at both at the three…

He…

He felt…

Something…

Today was…

He smiled.

-End Chapter Nine-

Morgri- I know I know… it was short… and it's been a long time. Don't you hate that? I've been so busy this month… and Finals are this week… ugh! But hey! It's a new chapter =p. Either way… I'm sure you know what's coming. Yes… the ending. 1 or 2 more chapters *sigh*. Either way… I promise it will be a good one… in fact… much better than this chapter which is just… 

Well never mind. Remember R&R! And look for the next chapter soon! For it will be there. WEEEEEE! I'm getting on you nerves now… well see you next time!


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing ^^

Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse…what if he does something horrible before they can?

Morgri- Good morning and evening everybody! Chapter ten is finally here. It's been a hard three weeks for me cause I'm getting ready to move… along ways away. So if I decide to make another chapter, is patient, like you've been! You know the old saying "Good thing comes to those who wait."

Enjoy!

"Speaking"

__

(Thoughts)

****

*Other peoples writing*

Flashback

*~*~* Shift in time or scene*~*~*

__

Shattered

By: Morgri

****

Chapter Ten

__

Today has been… it's been… I can't even describe it. Surrounded by my team and Hinata… it's been so… great! Is this what I've always wanted? Is this what I've always needed? Look at the way there smiling at me… there accepting me, something I've never seen. My heart is racing… I've never felt this way; this is the best feeling I've ever known. Am I happy? Am I just faking my happiness? I don't know… but I have an urge just tell them everything I feel… everything I want to feel.

I feel as if they… will cry with me sometime… or they'll just listen to me when I need them too. Although I feel myself coming to tears… there different. I don't feel regret… I don't feel as if I did something wrong, on the other hand… I feel as if I've accomplished something. But feeling and doing are to different things right?

It's probably just some selfish game I'm playing myself in. It so weird… I feel so different. They said they were going to surprise me… was this the surprise? This feeling that… it must be! It must be this feeling, the surprise… it's everything I ever wanted. More then ramen, more then food; the feeling of friends so defeats that… in fact, it demolishes it. Do I finally have it?

Meeting their eyes it sure seems like it. They don't look disappointed, but rather content. Or so I think… I've never had someone look at me like that; well, I don't think I have. I never imagined… I never imagined anybody looking at me like that! It so… what is one of those words? Wonderful? Great? Awesome? Well, something like that. I've only heard others say it, but… it really does feel… well… it feels weird saying that -- one of those words.

But who cares about words, or tears, or anything right now? I don't… well not as long I there with me. Maybe… maybe I, finally have someone who I can trust. Just for once I can tell them all my problems without having to worry about them being scared away, or without them telling me "I suck" or something like that. That would be so… that would be so… I guess I don't know what it will be. I haven't learned that yet. Happy, sad, who cares as long as I'm with them.

I'm so dumb… talking to myself like this. I can talk with them… I can say anything; well so-I-think. No words come out though. No words, just tears. Hinata… she… her look towards me is so different though… from everyone else's. I almost want to see her more. Is there a reason she looks at me like that? She looks at me with such concern, and yet… her eyes and smile shows… well kindness… I think; but not only that, her smile is beautiful. Whenever I look at her that smile shows comfort around me, as if she trusts me… trusts everything I do.

That's something I've never had either. Trust. I wasn't trustworthy, I always ruined the battles, got my team in trouble; everything went wrong when I was around. Hinata, though, could she possibly… well maybe she does, who am I to judge. If I say yes… then I'm wrong. I'm always wrong, that's how it's been all my life.   


It's funny though… why am I always concentrating on the bad? Heh, Sakura… she smiled at me sometimes. Those were my best moments. Maybe I did accomplish something. A smile… from someone else; A real smile… a kind smile… a perfect smile; a smile that – it's one of a kind. One that I saw her only use with me, or well, one that I think she only used with me.

Sasuke's smile though… is so weird. I can never really tell what he's smiling about. Could it be because of a joke, or could be because of a memory, or maybe it was because he was actually feeling good. Who cares though, I've had my moments with him as well. Heh, always was competition. Maybe I will earn his respect someday… maybe… I already have it. I wish I had it though… 

I probably would be the talk of the town if I did have it. It would be great! Then again… who really cares about what they think? What about what I think? Can't I be selfish once? Can't I just stay with my friends once? That's my one wish… and maybe… I'll get it…

So let me stop thinking… and let me… enjoy this moment. It could be the first of many, or it could the last. Either way… just this once, I want to try to be "happy", and though I don't really know what a happy feeling is… maybe, just maybe, I'll come across one. Maybe… it really is darkest before dawn… maybe dawn… is just around the corner… for me…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sasuke had excused himself minutes earlier, for though he still wanted to entertain Naruto, once again the hokage had called him in. He didn't really care for what reason she did, for he knew that she probably did it to see how Naruto was doing. He could understand that and didn't really mind going. 

Sakura and Hinata had other plans. Naruto was not only smiling… but almost seemed as if he wanted to… talk to them. Not just a few words… but really talk. Something they hadn't been able to do with him for a long time. It seems that everything they had planned was working. Though, they were rather disappointed to see that Sasuke had to leave.

Both girls almost felt tears come to there eyes as they saw the boy smile. It was so much different then anything they had ever seen before. Even the smile they saw when he was cutting himself wasn't the smile they saw today; today it was a beautiful smile. One they would probably treasure the rest of their lives. Both girls could only hope they would see more of this smile. Is eyes… they were also different. They sparkled. They were a different blue color. They shone more… they showed every bit of emotion Naruto had. 

It was…

Remarkable.

The change that both girls saw in Naruto. That was remarkable. From the boy who wouldn't even speak to the boy who was smiling right at them at that very moment. How could anybody ever doubt that? The boy who was in front of them – the boy they were looking at once wished death! With his own hands Naruto had almost done himself in. Now… he was right in front of them smiling.

That was…

Truly…

Remarkable.

For them to see him like that… was just awesome. They could only imagine what he had been through. Not even the girls worst experiences combined could even come close to what Naruto had experienced. Both of them were so happy to see him like that. They had been with him since the beginning (Naruto was certainly worth their time) and to see him as he was now was more then just a prize. 

Naruto thought he was worthless, both girls knew he wasn't. He was one of the most valuable people they both knew. Why couldn't he see that? How could he think he was worthless? They had to show him that they were his friends, they had to show him that they cared about it. That was why they had made today. The surprise was small, but would it be small to Naruto? Naruto was the one that counted anyway.

"Naruto," both girls said, "We have something for you."

Hinata approached Naruto with one hand in her pocket. Wrapping her arms around Naruto she whispered in his ear, "Naruto… I…I," She smiled to herself and put a necklace around his neck, "I love you," she finished, "And no matter what you can always count on me to be there for you." 

She had put around Naruto's neck a necklace containing a fourth of a puzzle piece. Sakura and Hinata had put on two necklaces that looked the same; Sasuke obviously carried the last part of the piece. "Although it sounds kinda of corney," Started Sakura, "This will be a signal of our friendship." She stopped for a second, "Naruto-*Kun*… you… you'll always all ways be our friend… we… I… don't know what I'd do without you." She then smiled at Naruto wiping away a small tear.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A sensation like nothing other came over Naruto. What was he feeling? Friends? The word ran through his head. They were his friends? He had friends? He clenched the puzzle piece in his hands… he didn't want to let go of it. Why did it suddenly mean so much to him? He felt relieved… he felt… happy? Sakura… called him his friend? That meant… she… did… like him, which meant… she was actually happy around him.

Love? Hinata said she loved him. He really didn't know what that meant though. Love was love though. Maybe… he could cry with her then. Not maybe… but he could. He didn't have to cry alone any more. He could share his pain. He didn't have to carry a large burden… because… now… he could get rid of it. That was what love was, right? That's what people whom loved did, right?

Who cared about what others thought of him? He didn't. He wouldn't worry about being called a monster anymore, he didn't have to worry about the stares anymore, he didn't have to worry about being a let down, because… because he had them now. They wouldn't leave him; instead they would defend him. 

What was wrong? He started sniffling. He didn't know why. He didn't want to cry. This time though he could stop himself… or could he? No he couldn't it… because… because. Why? Why couldn't he stop himself? He wasn't feeling sad… he was….

Tears…

He felt them fall… 

Except… they were different. 

He welcomed the tears… 

Because he felt… 

Happy.

Sinking into the chair he was sitting, an array of emotion came over Naruto. He was happy. Digging his face into his arms he cried. He was truly happy. Every bad thought… every worry, every bad emotion disappeared. It was just he and his friends now. It was just he and his happiness. No one… could take it from him… not today. Not this day… and maybe… just maybe… not forever.

Smiling at the boy Hinata whispered to Sakura, "Isn't it wonderful?"

"What?"

"Him."

Sakura smiled. He was wonderful. And the rest of the day… it would be a different day for him… much different, for today, he was just what he wanted…

Selfish.

-End Chapter 10-

Morgri – I realize that I've made some really small chapters lately, but I've been so very busy the last few weeks. I've been helping a friend with geometry; I've been getting ready for graduation… and most of all I've been getting ready to move to another location. Bear with me please. The next chapter will be the finale… however; I'm not sure whether I will have it up soon or not due to moving. I have no idea when I'll have my Internet service back. Don't worry, I'll finish it and it will be the longest chapter. Till the next chapter! TA TA!


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer – I don't own Naruto, and I never will, but as long as I have this disclaimer up here, I can right as many Naruto fics as I want. So that's a good thing   
  
Summary – After an incident, the pain, the loneliness, the deceit, the crying, shatter Naruto. Now he wants to make everyone happy, and what better way to make them happy then to rid them of him? After the attempt fails, Naruto isolates himself, thinking a fearing that everyone is against him, that they hate him, and that he is just a pain in there side. How can team 7 and a few others take Naruto out of this depression? Or worse...what if he does something horrible before they can?  
  
Morgri- Wassup everyone? It's tuff writing depressing fics... because you either have to be depressed to write one... or you have to have a rrrreeeeaaalllyyy good storytelling ability. I'm not sure in which I fall... but o well! I hope you enjoy this chapter. I was hoping I would you surprise in the last chapter... not sure I did.  
  
Anyway!  
  
Enjoy!  
  
"Speaking" (Thoughts) other peoples writing Flashback Shift in time or scene  
  
Shattered  
By: Morgri  
  
Chapter Eleven  
  
May 25,  
  
It is so weird... I just can't figure out why... when in the midst of such great people I became depressed. Well I do... deep inside me I know that feeling of lonileness is still in me. I want it... to disappear forever, yet... I'm not sure that it ever will. I've endured much the past months... and to be honest, I really did want to die. The feeling that I wasn't worth living, the feeling that nobody wanted me here, the feeling my life was just a pain in someone's side was overwhelming! I did want to die. It was the obvious solution. All the pain would have been gone. And sincerely, I tried. The feeling I encountered was remarkable. All the pain and sorrow was gone. Just like that! The more blood that went the greater the feeling came. But... day after day, I had to cut deeper and deeper to achieve that feeling. That made me want to die as well.  
  
Die...  
  
At least I would have had that feeling in death. Yet else could I have wished for? Life wasn't worth it. Not to me anyway. Twelve years was all too much. Heck, I didn't even know who my parents were and ironically, I still don't know. It hurts... it really does? Was I a mistake to this world? I'm still not sure? And I'm not sure that question will ever be answered. I don't have answers... so how could I possibly know? Even if I were to ask the people... they wouldn't answer, and even if they knew they wouldn't tell me. Because that's there nature. I won't complain either. I am a monster. I understand that. I cannot argue with that.  
  
It is a fact.  
  
Facts sometimes hurt. So does truth. For me, it's a mix of both. I hate it, I really do. I am a monster, it's the truth. There is proof, there is fact, so it must be true. I do. I really do hate being a monster. I tell you, I would let someone kill me if they had too. I just don't care anymore. That's not a bad thing though. Compared to when I DID want to die. When both those ninja's attacked me, I didn't care. The truth... I was about to ask them to kill me. The blood was working... but I needed more then that. I wanted more. And that drove me to the point of wanting death. Like marrow to my bones they read my mind. Pain was useless to me anyway. It was my friend... and even though it hurt... I wanted it... I needed it. Sure... I didn't enjoy it at first, but then, slipping into unconsciousness was where the bliss really started  
  
Who was I to know what bliss was though? Who was I to know that feeling? I was nothing. I was a monster! I was trash! A creature lived inside of me that terrorized everyone. I DESERVED every bit of harm. I did something that was wrong! I killed thousands. I was responsible for death, murder, genocide! I really was. Everyone was right. I was supposed to be secluded from everyone. I was dangerous... it wasn't all that hard to see. That's why I couldn't know happiness. That's why I couldn't know love.  
  
Or so I thought...  
  
Yes... I know I'm weird, and I may even be sick, I won't deny that either. But that is what I wanted. I was rescued from it. Even when I didn't know it or believe it. I was so confused when Hinata hugged me. I was so confused when Sasuke didn't hesitate to defend me. I was even confused when Sakura tended to my wounds while I cut myself. They were there. Slowly... they slowly freed me from my vice. They slowly showed me that they cared. They slowly showed me that I meant something. They showed me that my life might even be blessing... not a mistake.  
  
But why?  
  
Why, why is it that every time I see a knife or a kunai do I get the urge to take it and... and... cut myself? It scares me. It scares me to go back to that reality. Yet... deep inside me... deep inside me a voice still echoes "take the knife, take the kunai, your better off dead. Nobody wants you, your friends are lying! They hate you!" Is it the fox inside me? Or is it... me? Do I want myself dead?  
  
That surely does scare me, but... now... now that I know my friends are behind me... I can rest. They will stop that thought of death... they will give me a greater pleasure then death. They will give me their presence. Just that... just to know that they want to be with me changes my whole perspective in life.  
  
Life is good, isn't it?  
  
Just Maybe...  
  
No...  
  
It really is good...  
  
In fact...  
  
With them...  
  
It's great.  
  
I can smile. I've never been able to really smile, but know... I can. I'm not scared to show my real smile. I'm not scared to reveal my loneliness anymore. I can cry again... but differently... because they... they will be there!  
  
I guess at sometime pain and suffering will be negated. I guess... happiness will pull through sometimes. I guess... that... it's finally my turn for happiness... it's finally my turn to feel love and kindness and friendship. Just maybe... it won't change. The world hates me... but they don't hate me. There not the world... there my friends. Even if there from the world in real life... they certainly are heaven-sent to me.  
  
They really... deserve to be.  
  
Who would have ever thought of befriending me? I'm a murderer! But they took that chance! They risked death to befriend me. They saw the real me! The lonely... desperate Naruto that never showed himself. And best yet... they accepted me! They wanted me with them!? Even though I'm so repetive right now... "friends this, friends that," I think it's worth the repition. I couldn't stress enough what Hinata, Sakura, and Sasuke have done for me. A friend is a jewel... three is a treasure...  
  
It should stay that way.  
  
I don't want it to change...  
  
I don't care how selfish I am! Take everything away from me... my house, my money, my abilities... but... let me keep them. Don't take them away. Let me enjoy them while I live in this world. Let me keep them when I enter the next.  
  
Please...  
  
Grant me that one wish...  
  
Let me have that...  
  
You gave me friends...  
  
Please...  
  
Please...  
  
Let me keep them...  
  
Let me enjoy them...  
  
And most of all...  
  
Let them keep me...  
  
For I was dying before...  
  
But I'm living now.  
  
Let's move on...  
  
Let's get over our loneliness...  
  
Let's get over our pain...  
  
And instead...  
  
Let's forget it...  
  
Let's stay with the ones we love...  
  
For...  
  
These days and these moments have passed...  
  
-Fin-  
  
Not much to say... It was short... but I really enjoyed the end. Thank all of you for reviewing my story, and I hope you all really enjoyed. Keep a good eye out for me! Till Next time!  
  
-Morgri 


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